Sheldon Cooper Imagines (The Big Bang Theory)

Powerpoint is Sexy- Lemon Request (For Lily)

Warnings: Sexual content, Language. MILDY DUBIOUS CONSENT. 

Disclaimer: You should not pressure anyone to have sex with you. It's not cool. I don't endorse that and you definitely should not do most of what Lily does in this one-shot. Remember- consent is sexy. 

Request for @_shota-aizawa-king_ 

"Please, Sheldon?" 

"No." 

"Please?" 

"No. Coitous is an irrelevant biological interaction that merits no rewards." 

I smirked. "I'm so glad you said that." 

He looked confused as I sprung up and opened my laptop to the Powerpoint presentation I had prepared weeks in advance. The title screen read Sex With Lily: Why it Benefits You

If there was one thing Sheldon was sure to find arousing, it was Powerpoint. 

"Sex actually has many benefits!" I flipped to the first slide, displaying a picture of an Icelandic sexologist in a black dress. "According to Yvonne K. Fulbright, a Ph.D. sexual health expert, sexually active people have fewer sick days. People who have sex have stronger immune systems, and researchers at Pennsylvania's Wilkes University discovered that college students who had sex once or twice a week had higher levels of antibodies compared to students who had sex less often." 

Sheldon didn't seem impressed. "Correlation does not necessarily equal causation." 

"True," I replied. "However, the Journal of Health and Social Behavior says that sex reduces levels of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which is good for overall brain health. In addition, people who have sex once or twice a week have higher levels of immunoglobulin A, which fights illnesses in the mucous membranes of the lunges, sinuses, stomach, and intestines. In one group studied, sexually active people had 30% more immunoglobulin! Not to mention, it is good for your heart rate, blood pressure, and circulation. That keeps your body healthy and releases toxins and pent-up tension in the body." 

He shrugged. "I am already very healthy." 

"But are you happy? Sex makes you happier! Intercourse stimulates the production of endorphins, triggering positive feelings. Oxytocin is also released during sex, which puts people in a good mood, often referred to as an 'afterglow.' In a survey of 16,000 American adults, Swedish behavioral economists found that quadrupling sexual frequency from once a month to once a week boosted happiness as much as having an extra $50,000 in the bank. Princeton behavioral economists asked 1,000 women which life activities made them happiest. They ranked sex as number one. Carnegie Mellon suggests that erotic quality is most important in a sexual relationship to achieve happiness." 

Sheldon smiled triumphantly. "So it's not erotic quantity! Therefore we don't need to increase the amount of coitus we have." 

"When the amount of sex we have is none, that means the erotic quality is none, as well." 

"Well, we aren't in a sexual relationship, so it can't be most important to achieve happiness." 

"Fair enough. But..." I flipped the slide. "Did you know that sex improves your sleep? According to Sheenie Ambardar, MD, a psychiatrist in West Hollywood, the hormone prolactin is released after orgasm, causing relaxation and sleepiness. The National Sleep Foundation says that more sex helps you sleep and more sleep boosts your sex drive, causing the two to go hand in hand. For women, sex boosts estrogen levels, which enhances our REM stage and gives us deeper sleep."

"I thought this presentation was about benefits to me having sex with you." 

"Deeper sleep for me means I will be better rested and therefore in a better mood more often, which is good for you so that I am willing to drive you more places."