The Color of My Fears [COMPLETE]

Chapter 4 - More Visions [#12]

A week after I was humiliated by losing the race, I saw Nilo in the plaza. He was sitting on a concrete bench in a corner of the open basketball court, keeping himself eerily quiet, head slightly bowed, drumming with his fingers on the cold surface of the bench. His face, small and round topped by wisps of thin hair, projected a quizzical look. He wore khaki shorts, one button missing, and an old blue sleeveless shirt, torn on one side. A balete tree (lonok) stood behind him, its roots crawling above the ground and leaves spreading a cool shade over the bench. The lonok tree was said to be enchanted (mariit). None dared to be alone under its shade especially when it's high noon or be caught near the tree at nightfall.

On the other end of the bench about a meter away sat Totpik, a boy slightly younger than us, munching a piece of badela, (a species of sugar cane plant which has a large, soft, juicy flesh), juices oozing from the side of his mouth. (I wondered where he got the stick of badela; the badela sugar cane plants were planted in the field as an experiment to see whether the venture would become profitable. The field was closely guarded.) Totpik held a small, curved blade (sanggot) which he used to peel the skin off the sugar cane from time to time. (Why we called him Totpik has escaped my memory now. I wonder if it has something to do with 'toothpicks'.)

When Nilo saw me, I waved to him. "Where's your pet?" I shouted as I walked briskly towards him. I was waiting eagerly for a reply. I stopped in front of him.

"At home. Mother said I shouldn't bring it with me. She said it brings bad luck," he replied gloomily as if he and his pet were inseparable.

"Not when you raced against me. That's the first time you beat me," I said.

He was silent for a few minutes. Then he edged closer, as if making sure no one else could hear what's he's going to say next. Totpik obviously heard our conversation, stopped munching for a moment and strained his neck to listen to us.

"Yes, my carabao did run alright but I had that feeling in my gut I was floating. My carabao and me were lifted off the ground," Nilo said nervously. He was shaking. His voice toned down in a manner of one who realized that something indeed happened and could hardly believe it. He didn't want Totpik to hear what he wanted to say. He might be branded a boastful person (tikalon), much worse, a liar (butigon). And then I heard somebody called Totpik from a distance. I turned and saw two other boys, Bugok and Amay, who were a few years older than me, beckoning Totpik to come to them.

I turned to Nilo. Speechless, I began to feel suspicious. Not that I believed Nilo was lying. I harbored a feeling that black bird had something to do with it. I knew Nilo could not beat me in a race of carabaos, not in a hundred years. I felt cheated. I suddenly felt shortness of breath, something crawling on my feet, up towards my neck and the air becoming dry and chill and my eyes were heavy, making me drowsy, lifting my feet towards the lonok where the leaves were waiting and eager to enfold me in its arms because dusk had come and darkness started to claim its own...

Something snapped. I turned my back on Nilo and hurriedly left without so much as a goodbye.

-ooo-