terrible thoughts

chapeter two

I knew as spon as I left the house I was going to have an anxiety attack. I just did not know what would set it off. Great, now anything could make it tick.

The ride to school was quite, at laest for me. Mom and Alex were talking about his most recent benching max out. God, i need to get me permit. I thought as I was getting droped off at Vannwood high School. Oh,the most wonderful place to be, rude people, crowded hallways and, oh yeah, my favorite person of all, Ceiria Jones. Ceiria and I have never been on good terms, she was always the bubbly, cute, pretty one. I on the other hand could just pass a three on the 1-10 scale. At least my name is cool, my not fit but cool.

"Elettra." I turned around to find Clair, my best friend since sixth grade. A 5'2" , pale skinned, green eyed, blue haried girl. Clair is thin, unlike me, she has a small thy gap and arms I can wrap my hand around. My gguess she only weighs 125 pounds. I wish.

"Geez, you smurf. Are you ever going to keep your hair one color for a whole month? Your going to fry it."

"Then I will get a wig, and besides I have only died it four times." She said in a high, cute voice.

"Noooo, way more"

"It has been black, purple, green, and blue. Ha"

"And pink"

"Shut up"

The bell rang and we seperated for first hour.   I walk to chemistry, and sit at my assigned seat, beside Luke Taylor, at the  ajoined black granite counter.

I have always had a secret crush on Luke. He has dark brown and blue eyes. He is 6'2", and is bigger than me. Luke doesn't have the scupted six pack abs or the perfect arms he is works out enough to be intimidating but not overly huge and obnoxious.

"Hey, do you have the vocab from last Friday? Luke said, in a low rough voice.

"Um...y-yeah" the late bell rang and Mr. Raylin walked in.

"Alright class, we need to finish chapter 18 today. So get your act together" Mr. Raylin is not very intimidating. He's short, about 5'3" scrawny, and has a high sqeaky voice.

Luke leaned over to me "I hate listening to this guy, I feel bad, but come on"

"Yeah" I replied, almost in a wisper.
~

The bell rang for lunch. I got my things and stuffed them into my bag. As I was walking out the door of third hour, someone grabbed my hips, I screamed a little, and I heard a round of laughter.

My breathing quickened and my haert skipped beats, I was shaking. Running to the bathroom I was stopped by a teacher I don't know.

"Are you okay, young lady?"
Her hallow eyes where glazed over and red. She was old, dark bags under her eyes,  like she has not slept in days.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just boy troubles." That sounds believable, right?

"Okay..." the old lady sing-songed, she did not sound convinced but she left it alone and walked away.

I headed straight to the bathroom and in the biggest stall. I buried my face in my hands, and tried to keep the oxygen in my lungs but I couldn't.

After about five minutes of crying, i finily calmed my haert and breathing, I was still shaking,  so I just stayed on the ground in a ball 'til i could get back to normal.

I stood up and looked at the mirror, my hair is a mess and my eyes are puffy and red, mascarra smeared all over my face. Movies lie no can cry and still look actractive. I fixed my hair and reapplied make-up. By the time I was able to get back to normal lunch was over.

I merged with the crowd of students and walked in to fourth hour.