Escaping the Shadows

Hated never loved

Jades intro

Growing up, my father never loved me. He hurt me, verbally physically and any other way that I can remember. I'm an only child. I don't have any friends. I'm always in the corner of any room I'm in. I can't even answer a simple question in math class.

As a child my mother held me close, close enough that my father couldn't touch nor hit me. I've gotten the education I needed. Yet I couldn't handle the pressure of talking to anyone. Not my father. I can barely talk to my own mother.

Now that I'm in high school this education gets harder along with life. Sometimes I want it to end but I'm strong. I have to prove my father wrong that I'm not a mistake nor am I worthless.

When I was thirteen my mother was diagnose with cancer. They said she only had a few years to live. She was weak. To weak to protect me anymore. My father got more power and was mor hurt then I had ever had. My mother was bruised with the marks my father did to her. Now that she's sick I am the one with the bruises.

He hits and tortures me as if I had did the worst to him. At school I don't speak or look at the people there. I sat at the library every day since the beginning of my freshman year. It was perfect the way it was. Me just me, only me.

My father got more and more into drugs and lost it. He lost the little patience he's had with me. Now I am hurt. I am hurt for the littlest things I do. I wear dark clothes because they keep express the way I feel. Yet nobody ever notices. I cover my scars that came from the fathers like rock hands with long sleeve shirts.

My mother tries to help but she makes it worse. He makes her do things she doesn't want to. She's sick and he's making her worse. I cry many times but I'm to fragile to help her I get angry many times at myself because I can't help her. Since my freshmen I've cut many times. I'm happy my father hasn't noticed my marks of pain. He'll just question me in the worst way possible.

I thought it was all over. I was hated, never loved.