𝙅𝙤𝙞𝙣 𝙐𝙨

📖 𝙒𝙝𝙮 𝙒𝙚 𝘽𝙚𝙜𝙖𝙣 📖

Read at your own risk! Especially if you are easily upset/triggered.

A little background information about why we started this community:

Girls have been seen as weak all over the world. Sometimes, people even perceive them as useless and unwanted. Did you know, that in some countries, even now, boys are preferred over girls as boys as seen as those who will bless and give money to the family? All girls are seen as are dutiful wives and housemaids. Some parents raise a girl thinking only about their dowry and marriage.

The reason why patriarchy even began in the first place is because of mistaught ideals regarding sons and daughters. It's seen, that, by producing children, especially highly valued sons, and, ultimately, becoming a mother-in-law herself, a woman gradually improves her position within the conjugal household. In motherhood, the married woman finds social approval, economic security, and emotional satisfaction. This is the root cause of gender roles and differentiations between sexes. When a mother and a father hope for a son, they do so because of mistaught values: That sons will bring wealth to the family and daughters are only for marriage.

Let's think about it this way. A married couple, who already begot a son, hoping for another one, have a daughter instead. And, because the couple is taught that sons are favored over daughters, they are obviously not pleased in the least. The daughter will be made to do all the domestic chores, while a son, on the other hand, will go out and play with his friends at the park. Fast forward a bit, the daughter is now 15 years old. She's doing well in her studies and she's the topper in her class. However, the next day, the mother fixes her daughter's marriage to an older man living inside their hometown. In a matter of minutes, the daughter's life turns around. She's pulled out of her school, made to say goodbye to her friends, and married off to a man just but 20 years older than her. The daughter has no say in the matter and is immediately shipped off to the groom's house, to live with her new husband and in-laws. Once in her new home, the daughter works night and day, like a slave. She polishes the silverware, does the dishes, cooks meals, and does laundry for the entire family. On top of that, the mother-in-law orders her around even more and the daughter is exhausted by the end of the day. But, she's then faced with her husband who let's say, has certain needs, and consequently, he rapes her often. A few years later, at the age of 17, she's pregnant. The baby is born a year later, a girl, and instead of studying hard to get a job, the daughter now is a mother and is faced with the tedious task of raising a child. But once the child is 5 years old, the daughter decides she's had enough. Under the cover of darkness, she slips away with her child and a few belongings and travels to her parent's house. After hearing her whole story, her parents welcome her warmly. However, the daughter is penniless and does not have a job, being dependant on her husband almost her whole life. So she goes back to school, studies, and applies for a job at a Science Lab. She's lucky and gets the job. She realizes that women can do anything and promises to create a better life with ample opportunities for her daughter. And she did just that. Her daughter grew up to be a nurse and both of them lived happy and healthy lives.

After reading that, I'm sure you're all in shock. Like does that really happen nowadays? And how horrible! But, sadly, it does happen. While this is not a true story, it's a story: One of the women who overcame prejudices over their gender rose up and started a life of their own.

And now that we've read about that, let's move on and talk about gender roles and the differentiation between the sexes and why that happened in the first place.

An article about gender roles regarding Women and Men states, "The wife should sleep after her husband and wake up before him...When he returns home welcome him with a smile, help him in taking off his shoes and socks and ask him to sit down. Bring him water and biscuits, and with a smile, ask him about his day. A husband's happiness alone is your life's goal...Do not go out without your husband's permission anywhere."

Okay, now, who's angry? I definitely am. Is our life goal to please men and serve them like a slave? No! We have better purposes in life than these.

Boys in the Manjju Institute of Values in Bhopal (In India) are taught the following values about marriage: "After marriage, the bride should not think she's going to her in-law family to throw her weight around. Instead, she's going there to serve the family and perform her duties, in order to turn that home into heaven...The mother-in-law and father-in-law are never wrong...The bride should do everything according to the wishes and orders of the mother-in-law and father-in-law."

If I could say, this has triggered me. Quite too much, actually. Once married, the bride is thrust into a strange new household with her new husband and in-laws. Shouldn't she be getting used to her new home? Instead, she is ordered around like a slave. She's made to do domestic chores and not paid a single penny. It's volunteer work, except it's forced, not willingly done. And on top of that, she can't even contradict what she is made to do. "The mother-in-law and father-in-law are never wrong...The bride should do everything according to the wishes and orders of the mother-in-law and father-in-law." What is this nonsense? Yes, I do understand, that in traditional places, your in-laws should be respected. But to say that they are never wrong? And to say that they can order the new bride around like a slave? That's just absolutely barbaric and despicable.

One sacred text reads: "In childhood, a female must be subject to her father, in youth to her husband, when he is dead to her sons: a woman must never be independent. She can own no possessions other than her jewelry and similar possession. She is required to serve her husband in every way, even if he is a nasty person, rising before him and going to bed after him."

So a female can't do whatever she likes because of her gender? She's never to be independent? Well, with boys (and girls) taught values like these, it's no wonder that some genders don't have equal rights. And about "She is required to serve her husband in every way, even if he is a nasty person, rising before him and going to bed after him," that's just ridiculous. Even if her husband physically abuses her and/or rapes her, she should be quiet and say nothing? And still, continue to serve him like a slave? Absolutely not. We deserve our own rights to do as we please and we won't serve men as their housewives. We have our own lives to live, our own jobs, family... We don't need to be dependant on men.

Now, about periods. A friend of ours thought she was dying when she got her first period. What angered us was that the school did not have a class teaching girls and boys what may come in their puberty. Boys are told periods are gross, horrible and only girls go through them. Boys don't touch girls who are on their periods as they are considered "unholy", dirty and beneath them.

And did you know about 1 century ago, (in India) girls had to marry at 10, maximum? Even today some families make girls do this. A girl who had married at 8, had children at 12 and is now 18 is extremely sick. Andra's mother had seen her. She was in a horrible state. Her body was full of bruises, cuts, and her husband had beaten her. 

We did research on the amount of men who beat their wives (In India). 64% of men do. So we need to step up, unite, and stop this right away.

Girls Unite was created not only to empower girls, but to educate both genders, and teach everyone to love and care for girls as they are capable of much more than perceived to be.