Numbness

                     The feeling of numbness comes from a long line of hardships. There is no worse feeling then no feeling at all, for with no feelings you cannot love; you will never be able to feel happiness. The coldest feeling is not ice, nor ignorance but depression. The deadliest illness is not a virus or bacteria but instead it's all a mentality. The feeling of being numb is not intriguing or fun or anything of the sort, it is painful, destroying and the worst hell you can ever be in. For we feel there is no escape but there is, even if it does not come fast, the storm always runs out of rain. The night is darkest before the dawn. Depression is like when everything you've ever cared about, ever loved and suddenly it's all...gone. You fall into the wrong path, your desperate actions to get that last little drop of dopamine that we so crave, but in the process, we destroy ourselves with drugs, addictions, self-harm or suicide, all for a temporary problem. It rips you away, clawing at your skin, making you feel like you are the problem, that you deserve this punishment against you. 

                     It can come from a mistake you made years ago or just from a terrible life. Depression isn't like sadness. Sadness is a cloud that goes away, it's a stumble on a rock that lasts a second and makes you go "oh man, that was weird" but depression is like a cancer. Unlike the other, it's a cloud that doesn't go away, the cancer that constantly eats away at you, you either cure it while dealing with the worst part in your life, or it kills you. It can go on for years but in the end you either end up dead or scarred for life. But there is hope, no matter how numb you are you can always crawl back out of the pit, you fight for it, never letting it take you. It's all mental, you placed it there and can remove it, be humble and wait. The feeling of numbness fades and happiness will come. There is no greater feeling than having feeling, whether sad, angry, annoyed or glad, it's the best feeling you'll ever have. You will feel happiness and will love. Don't stop fighting.