ℂ𝕒𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥 𝕚𝕟 𝕥𝕙𝕖 ℕ𝕖𝕠𝕟 𝔾𝕝𝕠𝕨 ➃

41. Well, Almost Anything - ✭ Boston ✭

Vikki had dropped me off at home somewhere around two in the morning. I'd grabbed my phone and debated texting or calling Monica but took my friend's advice and didn't. Vikki told me to leave her alone for the rest of the night and to sleep it off. That would've worked if it wasn't for the fact that once I was inside my house I'd immediately sobered up.

Thoughts of Monica with Carter had made the alcohol induced mental fog dissipate rather quickly. Thinking of his arms around her and his mouth on her had made my guts churn in the most horrible of ways. And her tone of voice, almost as if she were annoyed by me, made an uncomfortable anxiety flow throughout me. It took everything in me not to pick up the phone and call or text her to see what she was doing.

She'd been like that since she'd left Vegas a few weeks back, passive and distant. Her voice wasn't what it usually was during our conversations. She didn't sound over-the-top excited every time I called anymore, like she used to. She just sounded like she were going through the motions, monotonous, unemotional—

How's your day? Oh that's nice. Everything's fine. I have to go because I have schoolwork. Love you. Bye.

That's all I seemed to get from her lately— generic responses to everything. That's it. There weren't any sexy phone conversations where I'd hear her moan my name. No watching her touch herself over video chat. Nothing. She was too busy with schoolwork. Not that it was a bad thing she was focusing on studies, but my assumption is she's focusing on them to avoid whatever is going on between us.

It's a terrible feeling to watch something that'd once burned so bright slowly fizzle down to a small flame. That's what I felt was happening with our relationship. I hated being so far apart, because if we were closer, I wouldn't let her slip away. I wouldn't let our relationship fall to the wayside. Not that I'm intentionally doing that now, but it's harder to maintain a true emotional connection when you can't look directly into the eyes of the person you love. I want to be able to show her the truth and depth of my feelings, because with Monica, I feel all of the things. I feel every single one of them.

I'm currently sitting in the kitchen with a cup of tea watching some action movie. It's a bit early, and first thing on a Sunday morning, but why not? Just as I watch someone blow up a warehouse my phone starts to ring. I immediately pause it when I see Cherry pop up on my phone's screen.

I press mute then run my hand through my hair. After a moment of deliberation, I pick it up with, "mornin' Cherry."

"Morning... So, how are you feeling?" Her voice is a little taught but not too irritated.

"I'm actually feeling fine." Physically, that is. "I sobered up when I got home. Listen, last night I had a bit too much and knowing you were out with Carter set me off. I didn't mean to say what I said."

"I wasn't out with him though. We just happened to be in the same place. He had even been out on a date before he came and sat down with me." That's believable enough and Monica isn't a liar, so there's that. I can't imagine Carter's cup of tea would be taking a date to a coffee shop, though. He seems more of a 'let's get drunk and touch each other' kind of guy.

"Alright." I'm not going to press the topic because she'd forgiven me for the whole Louisa situation. I'm not about to sit here and start a giant argument for running into her ex. "So, what'd you guys end up talking about?" There's a long pause that makes my heart want to sink to the floor. "Monica?"

"Uhm, it's actually something I've been meaning to talk to you about." Oh God. This is it. She's going to end everything. "I was thinking about studying abroad next semester."

Oh thank fuck. She's not getting back together with Carter. She's just going to study abroad.

Wait a second...