𝙈𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨 [Dr. Stone]

||Pain||

(WARNING: GORE, ANGST AND SWEARING!!!!)

Around an half year passed away. You and Ukyo got quiet a good relationship, yet you were still friends.

He often confused you with his actions, the way he carried for you or how nice he was. It felt so warm and nice for you, yet you didn't understood these feelings, while Ukyo knew very well what he felt towards you.

When he had to go off for missions, you felt really lonely and sad. Taiju and Yuzuriha were there for you, still you couldn't feel the same warm feeling you felt next to the tall male. Even by Tsukasa you felt different.

You missed Ukyo, very much while he was gone.

Today was another day were he had to go off for a mission and you couldn't help, but think about bad things and remember the moments Tsukasa took you with him to kill innocent people.

The pain you felt in these moments filled your heart again, as you laid down on the millet bed. You curled yourself up in a ball and hugged your ankles, sobbing quietly, as you buried your head in the edge of your knees.

You wished Ukyo was around to comfort you, like he always did when you accidentally hurt yourself.

His soft, yet deep voice mumbling something in your ear as he touched gently your hand and patted with his other one your head. "Don't cry." he had always said and you immediately stopped to cry, leaning in his touch.

Meanwhile the other part of you always said: "Don't get too close to him." "You didn't deserved it." "You lied your whole life, which makes you a sinner." Yet you never wanted to listen to it and kept forward.

But today this voice was a lot stronger than these past weeks. This voice wanted to eat you alive. Delete you. End you.

You sobs turned into heavy tears. You started to hate everything that surrounded you. Even yourself.

'Why?!'

You screamed inside your mind. Oh how you wished that someone could comfort you right now. Especially when this someone was no one other than Ukyo. But he was on a mission. Again.

'Why does he have to go to this stupid missions?' asked you, your selfish side.

'He has to do it for the Empire's sake.' you thought to yourself, to at least try to keep the last percents of your sanity safe.

Tears streamed down from your red eyes, going down your red cheeks. You wanted to punch yourself for being such a monster, but not to mention that the presence of people also ruined you, yet Ukyo never did that to you.

'-and Tsukasa, with Yuzuriha and Taiju!'

Again this war in your mind. Your head ached like hell and blood dripped down your nose.

You quickly pressed a rag against your nose and tried to calm down, taking deep breaths.

Soon enough you fell asleep, yet your peaceful nap didn't last long, as you woke up from having nightmares.

You started to cry again, feeling weak and pathetic. 'Such an useless piece of shit.' you thought to yourself, as a painful scream escaped your mouth. Luckily enough nobody was next to the sleep-caves and nobody could hear you, or so you thought?

Meanwhile in the same time, a white haired tall male searched for you, to show you what he found in the woods. He wanted to make you happy, not knowing about your true feelings.

Yes, you never told him about your mental breakdowns, when he wasn't there, because you didn't wanted to bother him. Anyone, but him.

Suddenly the male heard a painful scream escape your cave, as he quickly rushed towards your side. 'As I remember this happened when I firstly met her.' he thought as panic filled his heart.