A RANDOM BOOK

just because im bi (a rant)

just because i'm bi doesn't mean i want a threesome. just because i'm bi doesn't mean i'm checking you out in the locker room. just because i'm bi doesn't mean i can help you with your sexuality by kissing you.

i've recently gave my snap out to a guy, i mentioned it in my comments/thoughts/status feed thing (idk what it's called), i was getting lunch and he asked for my snap, i happily gave it to him.

he added me and we began talking, he seemed very focused on nudes. i kept saying no but he was attractive and i wanted to give him a shot. because i "give the benefit of the doubt so much so [i] don't seem like the bad guy" -my therapist

i blocked him. we played 21 questions and he asked if i was straight, i said no... i'm bi. he asked me how long i've known i said since i was 12.

he then asked "so you'd be down to have a threesome?"

i then let him know that i couldn't keep this up and i didn't want to hear from him again, i blocked him.

here's my issue, even if i gave this kid another chance he would most likely have asked me again if we became a thing, the first thing he thought of when sex with me was brought up, was another women. every single guy friend i've came out to had asked me that at one pint or another, i respectfully tell them to shut up and they apologize and we move on. i can't stand having to answer that stupid fucking question. am i not enough? or has the fetishization gone too far?

next, i think heterosexual women people fail to understand the difference between romantic and platonic feelings. it's been known that it's harder for men to feel platonic feelings toward a women, they most likely go straight to romantic/sexual.

with this thought in mind, straight women who have only ever been seen as something sexual from the eyes of someone who could be attracted to them (men) struggle to understand that they aren't being looked at sexually from someone who could be attracted to them (queer women). the idea of only being seen as sex is ingrained in their minds so much that they think anyone with a change of being attracted to them is into them, and that's false.

as a women i know what it is like to be sexualized, it sucks. i know how to turn off my "romantic" feelings and turn on my "platonic" feelings, because i know how others feel when they are uncomfortable around sexualization.

so no, i don't have a crush on you.

finally, IM NOT CHECKING YOU OUT!

i liked your shirt, so i looked at it again. i liked your pants so i looked at them again. i liked your makeup so i looked at it again.

in the dressing room or locker room, i'm not looking at your half naked body because that's fucking weird, also, i wouldn't want someone to do that to me so i won't do it to them. we're all in a very vulnerable situation, that's not time i would give a second look.

also, the world doesn't revolve around you, not everyone is checking you out.

sorry for all the negativity, weighing heavy on me right now.

stay safe, drink water, make sure you tell yourself you're amazing!

rambo <3