One Shots ;)

Alone

Alone

4/4/2021

The sound from the ticking clock echoed throughout the quiet apartment, ringing lightly to signify the new hour.

She pulled her hands down her tired eyes and turned her head, her sullen eyes boring holes through the clock. 4:00 AM.

Groaning, she turned her head back to the work in front of her and lifted her arms with effort, picking up her pencil again and pushing it to the paper. Her fingers shook as she continued writing, her body aching with fatigue.

The paper was due tomorrow, she couldn't go to sleep now, she needed to finish. She needed that 100. Her professor expected much from her, the only student in her class to be keeping an A in the class.

She couldn't let it drop, not now.

Blinking the sleep out of her eyes, she let her throbbing hand write more meaningless words onto the page, words that just went into one ear and went out of the other, words that she had no hold over, words that were broken.

Empty. Just like her promises.

She breathed out a laugh, though deranged, explained her thoughts completely. What was she doing here? Writing a paper at 4 am in a cold and empty apartment building.

Oh right, she did know what she was doing.

Putting down her pencil, she picked up her phone and clicked on her messages. The most recent one dated months ago. She opened all her contacts and read through the messages.

She had friends, a lot of them actually. It was easy to stay connected when they lived less than an hour away. Lunchtime at school was full of smiles and laughter and jokes, with faces she used to cherish.

She wasn't exactly sure when life started to get in the way.

It started small, her friends (could she even call them that now?) rolling their eyes at her when she denied their invitation to hang out and calling her a workaholic. Even her parents, who had always been proud of her perfect track record, started asking her to spend more time with people.

College just made it worse. Getting accepted into an Ivy League was an honor, but it invited more work, which she took in stride.

The daily phone calls and texts turned into weeks, then months. At some point, she had stopped contacting her family and friends back in her hometown completely.

Her best friend was the only one who had continued trying to reach out to her, even after the others gave up and let her go. But everyone had their limit.

Fingers hovering over her best friend's contact, she contemplated saying hi. Then she thought better of it, putting the phone off to the side. It was out of place, just like she was.

The full force of her misery hit her, and she gasped out a sob. Why was she doing this? She didn't bother to catch the stray tears that rolled down her cheek and onto her paper.

They would just dry by tomorrow, along with her anguish as she started another day the same as all the rest.

Her breathing evened out and turned back to normal as the time ticked on. She dried her tears and continued writing while the hole in her chest grew larger. She finished sometime after 5, walking to her bed with her feet dragging.

As she laid down, she stared at the ceiling, making the promise to call her parents the next day. Her bleary eyes closed as she drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, she didn't feel any better than she did the night before. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and the sleep delirium wasn't helping her case.

Her promise was forgotten.

A couple of days passed. At the end of her class, her professor stopped by her desk. He handed back her paper that she spent so long writing.

The tear marks were still noticeable, but if her professor noticed, he didn't say anything about it.

"Wonderful work, as always," he said, smiling at her. She looked down at the paper and the big A written on it.

She forced out a smile and gripped her paper tightly, almost enough to rip it. She rushed out of the classroom, feeling sick.

Once she got back to her room late in the evening, she sat back in her chair roughly, throwing the paper onto her desk.

It was almost crumpled, but the A stared back at her tauntingly. She looked at it for a long time, before looking away.

She got the grade, so why wasn't she happy?

Her hands trembled as she pulled out her work from that day, more work to be done. The A on her paper was forgotten as she started on a new one.

The same cycle, over and over and over again.

She should be happy for getting that A, yet she wasn't. Why?

Looking at the new paper numbly, she started writing again. She was done, done with trying to deny it. She finally accepted the reality she had been rejecting for so long.

She was all alone.

The clock continued ticking through the silence, the only other noise being her scratching pencil. 

That was depressing... it came to me in a dream I'm fine I promise XD

-Blossom ;)