Behind the Curtains

1

After singing my acoustic rendition of Mr High Roller, I feel a sudden lump in my throat that made me reach for a bottle of water beside me on stage. I was invited to do an interview on a TV show and they requested for me to sing my latest single. Hindi naman ako puwedeng tumanggi dahil ito ngayon ang nasa #1 spot ng music charts nationally. I can't believe na sa dinami-dami ng kantang inirelease ko sa album ay ito pa talaga ang nagtrending.

May sumenyas na isang crew na ilang segundo na lamang ay magpapatalastas na kaya nagpaalam sandali ang show host ng palabas. Nang sumigaw ng cut ang producer ay dali-daling nagsilapit ang mga make-up artist ng host, nakita ko rin na tumayo sa kinauupuan niya ang manager ko at lumapit sa akin.

"Are you okay? Do you need anything?" tanong ni Jess sa akin at nag-abot ng isang kahon na tissue.

I nodded then briefly smiled, inalis ko na sa balikat ko ang strap ng gitara saka ito iniabot sa assistant ko para ilagay backstage. "Ilang minuto pa?" naiinip kong tanong saka bumuntong hininga. I just wanted to finish this interview and go straight home to my pets.

Jess tapped my shoulder twice, "Don't let them see you acting like that." sabay gamit ng nguso niya paturo sa direksyon ng maraming crew na nanonood sa amin ngayon at nakatingin sa akin. Napahilot ako ng sentido ko saka pumikit sandali. This is giving me headaches.

Tumingin si Jess sa wristwatch niya, "Thirty minutes pa, konting tiis nalang makakauwi na din tayo."

Medyo matagal-tagal 'yong commercial break kaya nagpaalam ako para magpunta sa comfort room, I had my assistant get my personal make-up pouch since I don't have make up artists with me and I don't do heavy full glam look anywhere.

Luckily, walang katao-tao sa loob ng CR kaya inilock ko ang pinto saka lumapit sa sink at ibinaba ang pouch ko doon. I stood there for what feels like eternity looking at my own reflection through the mirror, scanning every corner and every line on my face to see if there's anything that I had to erase or cover with skin tint but there's none. I tried not to rub my face with hands out of frustration. Iniisip ko pa lang 'yong mga itatanong nila mamaya ay naghahalo na ang iritasyon ko at ang anxiety ko. I feel anxious because I might not be able to smoothly dodge the question asking about who is 'Mr High Roller'. Yes, I am aware of what they may ask to me later, and I can't afford to mess any interviews since sigurado naman akong tahimik na ang buhay niya kung nasaan man siya.

I grabbed a single piece of make up wipe and quickly erased my lipstick because the color of it bothers me so much. I picked my favorite shade of liptint that would likely resemble the color of my lips if it weren't so dry and pale. Pagkatapos kong magretouch ay dali-dali kong inilagay 'yong liptint sa pouch at binuksan ang pinto para bumalik sa set.

"So, any plans for concert? Or anything you want to promote?" tanong sa akin ng host habang nakangiti. I did promote my recently released album and that's it. Nararamdaman din yata ng host na medyo tipid ako sa pagsagot ng mga tanong niya kaya siya na rin ang nag-aadjust sa tuwing nafifeel niyang magkakaroon ng awkward pause.

"Sigrid, as you may already know, all of us are dying to know who is Mr High Roller. Will you give as some details about this lucky guy? I've been a fan of your music since you started 5 years ago and I'm still intrigued kung sino ang inspiration mo sa mga kanta mo." umayos siya ng pagkakaupo at medyo naglean-in sa direksyon ko.

I forced a smile and think about what I rehearsed every night on how to change the subject. "Actually, I have some clues but I'm afraid it isn't about Mr High Roller." I sit back and watched her panic, I can tell that she was expecting me to fill in the details.

"O-Oh!" tumawa siya ng bahagya, "So what is it this clue about? Fill us in. I'm sure curious ang lahat sa kung anong plano mo for your upcoming projects."