• 15.07.2020 diary entry •
tw // mentions suicidal thoughts and cheating
Today i felt like dying. Literally. But it feels so scary when you think about it I mean no one really knows what happens after you die do they ? so i think I'm too scared to actually die because it might hurt. A lot. And I have no way of knowing what happens afterwards. I don't why i got overwhelmed but I think a lot of things led to it and for the hundredth time I'm thinking of whether things would've been better if I did my OWLs properly. The thing I didn't and I know it and I'm so scared to get my results and see how badly I messed up cause I admit it I messed up real bad. I was in a slump a huge slump with no way out and it's not an excuse it's the truth. What with everything happening because of the pandemic, (mind you everyone thought it only affects muggles but it affects wizards too) and finding out that dad cheated on mum I wasn't in a good place at all and no one seemed to notice it that way, maybe I didn't let them but my mum always says she can see right through me so shouldn't she have been able to..? All I know is I'm ready to get a hint of normalcy in my life and I'm ready as hell to go to Hogwarts again. Hell even James Potter is a happy and welcome distraction. 48 more days to go.
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Epiphany | James Sirius Potter
Fanfiction"I'm James. James Sirius Potter and I'm going to marry you one day" the boy smirked at me and strutted away his friends giving him high fives and cheering him on. I watched him go in disbelief. The past five minutes seemed like a dream... did that a...
