-Months Later-
I sat down at my desk and took out a used notebook, it was old and dirty from smudges that I had accidentally given it. I put it on my desk, grabbed a pencil and began flipping through the pages. I use this notebook to write some of my thoughts down when theres a lot of things going through my head.
I got to the empty page and i got the pencil in my hand and began to write.
"So lately in the last couple of months Ive been talking to gilbert more than regular, and we've become very close. Im starting to think he has feelings for me too but i dont really know. I really want to confess my love for him but im scared of ruining the friendship, maybe i should just keep my mouth shut? Either way im happy i still get to be his friend even if that means we'll never become anything more. Sometimes i just can't stop thinking about all the memories we've had together though, the memories that have really brought us closer... I remember that cold winter morning that i sat with him on the bench in the park, we just talked and i remember i was looking down at my phone and for a split second that i looked up at him my eyes synced with his eyes, and somehow that made the coldest winter day into the brightest summer morning. I dont know if i'll ever have a chance with him, as much as i do want it. But hopefully one day i look back at this notebook entry and say "look where we are now!" or just at least smile. I just hope hes as willing to help build the bridge to connect our continents as much as I am."
I closed the notebook and looked at the time "1AM?!" No way... it was so late. I cant believe i stayed up this long, i quickly got off my chair and went to go brush my teeth. When I finished brushing my teeth i walked to my bed and tucked myself in for the night, as I fell asleep the wondering thoughts about him lingered in the back of my head, like usual... I closed my eyes and drifted off to a place far, far away.
I woke up, I got ready for school and my mom drove me there as normal and i walked to the morning spillout and sat with my friends. I could tell they were talking but i didnt really wanna join the conversation so I went on my phone. The bell rang louder than ever and I got up and walked with my friends to science. Science seemed normal, I had finished my work early so i began to dm Gilbert on discord and we ranked everyone in the class,
after the bell rung i walked to history with my friends, I arrived at history and as a class we went to lunch. Lunch also seemed normal. The food tasted a bit weird though, almost bland but really, when did it not taste bland? After we all got dismissed to the lunch spillout I decided to move to a bench by myself in the shade because i couldnt stand being in the sun and none of my friends wanted to move. As i sat down i couldn't help but think about gilbert then, i saw him approaching me from behind, he seemed to be wanting to sit down next to me "Hola!" he said. I admired his voice once again, for some reason i know we've always talked but whenever i hear him i just cant help it. As soon as i zoned back in again he was already sitting down next to me by the bench. I stared at him and our eyes linked, he was about to start speaking, i was curious towards what he had to say...
*DING*DING*DING*
WHAT? Was that my alarm? And most importantly... was that all a dream? I cant believe my own dream left me on a cliffhanger?! ESPECIALLY a cliffhanger that involves gilbert. I looked at the clock and it read exactly 7:47 AM, thats a weird time to wake up but its whatever. I got dressed up for school and had some breakfast... I checked discord but no one had sent any texts so i just decided to go on tiktok. I spent the car ride to school on tiktok but i couldnt stop thinking about the dream that I had last night... it was very strange. I really do wonder what gilbert was trying to tell me in the dream, but i guess we'll never know.
I looked back up again and realized we were pulling up to the school so i grabbed my backpack and got out the car to walk to spillout where i sat with my friends. There we talked until the bell rang. As i was leaving spillout though i noticed gilbert walking to science and I couldnt help but just stare at him. What would he think about if he had the same dream I had last night? What does he think about in general? Does he ever think about me? I had so many questions that needed answers.
As i walked around the school to get to science i began to think, i feel like ive seen this exact place before? Like not the school like this exact moment i feel like ive lived it before even though i know i havent... I just brushed it off though because it didnt seem important.
As i entered science i sat down and it was a normal day, we just wrote notes and did assignments. Nothing too special, but just for some reason i kept thinking about that dream i had, this assignment and this class in general... i feel like ive done it before? I probably did it in elementary or something, no need to overthink. After science I walked to history and from there the class walked to lunch. Lunch was fun, I texted with some friends and ate my food. After we went into spillout though all my friends were talking and having fun and then I noticed that there was a free bench so i told everyone to come with me and sit on it. No one wanted to move though so i went alone. Just like the dream.
I looked up and... i saw gilbert walking towards me? No way. This also happened in the dream? what was happening... this day seemed a lot like my dream of the previous night. I was shocked but welcomed him as he was approaching my bench. Maybe this time it wont leave me on a cliffhanger, unless its one of those weird dreams that keep repeating over and over again.
He seemed worried and anxious, i got a little bit afraid because obviously he seemed to be in a bad state right now. As he sat down he looked at me in the eyes...
"Julianne I need to tell you something.."
Then, it finally clicked. I was reliving the dream. Like for real. The same dream that had left me on a cliffhanger... Then my thoughts were interrupted
"I like you..."
Words so perfect, welcoming and kind. It was like if the feeling of relaxing in your room hearing the rain pour onto your window turned into words, but at the same time it was the same sensation as standing on the edge of a cliff with nothing to hold onto and feeling like your about to fall and have the shore drift you away. It was like the happiness of a successful birthday party filled with presents and love but also the anxiousness of the first day at a new school. It was a mix of both. I didnt know how to respond. I just stared at him while trying to make a good response to a love confession. Obviously i didnt want him to think i didnt like him back because... well because i did like him back. I did want to be with him. I did want to let him know my feelings.
"I dont want to turn this friendship into something awkward and if we do date i dont want it to become weird when we break up but... I also do like you back. I've actually liked you since the day i saw you on the first day of school."
Thats what i responded with. To be honest if I was put into this situation a couple months ago id be freaking out but for some reason i felt... calm? I felt safe with him and i didnt need to feel anxious or worried when i spent time with him.
I stared into his brown eyes and his black hair, the brim of his glasses were so clear i could almost see his exact skin tone through them. His eyes glimmered on the bright, sunny, afternoon. He was leaning in towards me... WAS HE LEANING IN FOR A KISS? My eyes began to wander, Oh god what do i do? Do i kiss him? I dont know?! What will happen if i do? Oh god, are my friends watching?! When i looked back at him he was getting closer and closer. Without thinking... I leaned in. We kissed. Were we official? Maybe. But we did kiss, and I had finally achieved what ive been thinking about all this time finally...
We had built the bridge, not with sticks and stones. But with love.
