Ready to Fall

Chapter Ten

If Dean thought things were about to get better between him and his best friend, he was simultaneously right and wrong in the worst of ways. Without Charlie there to act as the voice of reason, Dean falls back under the assumption he's not actually feeling anything for Cas other than enjoying being close to someone; someone who just happens to be his best friend.

He's sure that when they both go back to school, the way his heart clenches every time he wakes up to Castiel burrowing against him, or the flip flop his stomach does whenever Castiel laughs or smiles, will go away. (The fact that he may have been experiencing similar feelings before any of this even started is completely irrelevant.)

Instead of trying to figure it out, he pushes everything to the side and decides not to waste any more time wondering about what he does or doesn't feel for Castiel.

Things begin to go to hell in a hand basket on a particularly cool night towards the end of their summer vacation as he, Castiel, and Sam are sprawled out under the inky, black Kansas sky watching bright showers of stars fall around them.

Sam is on his right, his hands behind his head and his face drawn up in wonder, and Castiel is on his left, a quiet excitement rolling off of him in shallow waves. As a particularly bright stream bursts above their heads, Castiel gasps, his eyes practically sparkling in the moonlight, and Dean’s suddenly hit by how much he cares for Castiel. He’s struck by how much he wants him to have the best life he can have, and for all the good things that could possibly happen to his best friend to actually happen. There's an overwhelming gratitude growing within him that he even met Castiel in the first place, and that Castiel is the person he is.

With his feelings in his throat and a smile skipping across his face, Dean reaches between him and Castiel and lays his hand down, palm up, his fingers lightly brushing Castiel's arm as he waits for his best friend to take his hand. Castiel looks down between them and smiles before sliding his hand into Dean's and grinning like Dean's never seen him grin before.

Everything about the night feels right and perfect and if Dean could stay just like this forever, he would.

As the showers start to fade, Sam's eyelids begin to droop and after a while he heads in the house to go to bed, leaving Dean and Castiel to watch the few last stars streak across the sky.

With Sam gone, Castiel turns into Dean, resting an arm over Dean's waist and letting his head settle on Dean's chest. Dean curls an arm around his shoulders and breathes deeply. The air around them is thick, but a breeze that plays through the air eases the oppressive heat that usually drenches Kansas in the summer. Other than the slight rustle of trees and the quiet chirp of crickets, they're enveloped in a peaceful kind of silence that seems perfectly fitting for the atmosphere. In a word, it's picturesque, and Dean's soaking it all up like a sponge.  

"I don't wanna go back to school," Dean states quietly, his fingers rubbing idly over Castiel's shoulder.

"I thought you liked school," Castiel points out.

"I do," Dean agrees. "I just like this better."

Castiel raises his head just enough to drop a kiss to Dean's lips. "It has been a good summer," he says.

Dean smiles. "Yeah," he agrees, "it has."

After a while they fold up the blanket they've been lying on all night and head into the house, traipsing up to their room as quietly as possible.

Dean tosses the blanket into the corner and Castiel goes straight for the bathroom, brushing his teeth and changing into his pajamas. Dean goes in after him, and when he's finally climbing into bed with Castiel, Cas pulls him in by his pajama shirt and seals their lips together.