The glimpses into a life Bucky never thought was possible for himself. A world where he would find someone who he could love and be loved in return - a person he could start a family with. This is how an ex-assassin navigates the world of parenthood.
Summary: There's a lazy transition into parenthood after the initial rush and panic of having a baby suddenly added into your lives.
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The days stretched on with a strange haze hanging over them. Schedules? What were those? Sometimes you were awake all night and slept the morning hours away. Sleep when the baby sleeps, right? While you savored in the soft touches and gentle movements and sweet little newborn scent of the late morning light, Bucky was sent out.
"We seriously need more burp cloths. We're using them up too fast," You had lamented that morning, using a hand towel from the bathroom as you burped Rebecca on your shoulder. Your shirt covered in smelly wet spots from a previous feeding.
"And will you please get her birth certificate today?"
He had analyzed the selection in the store for too long. Comparing the different patterns and fabric choices on display. Was one better than the other? Were the expensive ones more efficient than the cheaper brands? Bucky ended up grabbing three packs of pink flower and heart patterned burp cloths. And then he found himself looking at all the plush toys and teethers.
She'd probably like the little gray elephant toy. It was soft like that like purple fleece blanket you kept wrapping her in. He adds it to the red basket. And then all the clothes and onesies and hats and socks and shoes. Who the hell puts shoes on a newborn? But he looks at them anyway. The gray onesie with the little owl that says I'm a hoot! His hand pauses on a lilac onesie that says Daddy's little princess. Yes, she certainly is. Rebecca is tiny and gorgeous and smart and his, his little girl. How fucking crazy is that?
He pauses at the vibration of his phone in his pocket.
As your wife, and the mother of your CHILD! I think I deserve some chocolate for this.
For what? He wants to ask.
And then there's a picture of his little girl in an orange Jack o' lantern onesie with a little green hat. He wants to cry.
Bucky grabs three mixed bags of Halloween candy. He spends way more than he probably should. But she deserves it. She deserves the whole fucking world. And so do you, for loving him the way you do and giving him this chance at a normal life.
You thank him in kind for the chocolate and burp cloths, coo over the little plushie and assorted onesies.
"And the birth certificate?"
He hesitates, "Here's the thing, baby." You raise your brows with an amused smirk, bouncing Rebecca in your arms. "They won't give it to me."
Your expression draws tight, "Why? You're the father."
He laughs, sitting down on the barstool, "They think it's an error that I'm actually 109."
It takes a moment, then you're laughing, bright and beautiful to his ears. "So, what, they don't know who you are, or...?"
"Thought my ID was a fake too. I need to have my original birth certificate for them to take it."
"Those bastards," you grin with a shake of your head.
Bucky pets Alpine's head when he pushes up against his arm on the counter, "I don't even know where that stuff is. Maybe SHIELD has it."
"I'm sure the hospital has a copy on hand."
"Baby," he purrs with a playful glint, "I was born at home. It was 1917."
You pause, holding Rebecca steady in your arms. "Jesus, Buck. Sometimes I forget that stuff. God, you're really robbing the cradle here."
He laughs, wrapping his arms around you, kissing the side of your head with a loud smack of his lips. "Yeah, and you're stuck with me, doll."
Swaying in his embrace, slow and lazy, feeling so content. His beautiful wife, his beautiful daughter.
Rebecca snoozes in his arms on the couch. You've convinced him to watch some Halloween marathon on TV. Shifting through a half-eaten bag of candy between you.
"Ooh, this one is good."
He pulls his gaze from the sleeping little babe in his arms to the opening credits of another movie.
"Did you ever read the original comics? They came out in the thirties, I think? Big show in the sixties. This one is from the '91. I probably wore out our VHS of it growing up."
He stares at the Christmas carolers on the screen. The camera slowly pans up, organ music and snapping starts. It's enough to stir his curiosity.
"Uh huh."
You turn your head, something tugging at the corner of your lips, "Just trust me on it."
Rebecca bats a little hand out as she snuggles into his sweater, legs giving a small kick. He wonders what she dreams about.
Opening his mouth as you shove another piece of chocolate his way. Taking your finger in his mouth with a shocked little gasp from you. He grins, gives it a kiss before you pull it away.
"Naughty boy," you tease.
Bucky nudges his knee against yours, careful of his movements to keep her from waking up. At least the noise of the TV and usual amount of music you had playing never seemed to disturb her. The only thing that ever did the trick was when he was making coffee for you in the morning, the sound of it brewing always had her gurgling in the crib.
"Okay, if you want this relationship to continue," he whips his head to look at you. Your playful smile has him relaxing, slowing his heart rate. You hold up two orange-wrapped pieces of candy. "You need to understand that these ones are far superior to these."
You open the larger package, pulling out an oval-shaped piece of chocolate. You hold it out for him to take a bite. Then repeating the same thing with the round piece. Chocolate and peanut butter melt in his mouth.
"See? Reese's pumpkins are the way to go."
He nods, amused at your preferences. "It's sweeter than the regular one."
You nod, finishing off the rest of it yourself. "Buy me a pack of these when we're fighting and I'll forgive you every time."
Bucky ticks that away for later use. Letting the warm comfort of you resting your head on his shoulder and the tiny weight in the crook of his left arm settle over him.
The days and nights blur together. Sleep is erratic and stolen in small moments of peace when Rebecca naps. He finds himself spending large amounts of his time just looking at her. Tracing fingers over little legs and toes. Letting her suckle on the metal of his hand. His burner phone has been off for almost a month now, work and missions and life outside of this tiny slice of heaven is far from his mind. This right here? This is his life now. Little pink hands that seek him out in the morning, happy little gurgles, bright blue eyes. She is his whole world. He can say that even with everything in his past, he was still able to help make something that is perfect and pure, and so very lovely.
