Cyclic

It was the same old story again and again. And every time I felt equally guilty and happy.

Whenever we parted ways, we ended up getting together again.

Whenever we got together, we ended up kissing.

Whenever we kissed, we couldn't keep our hands to ourselves and ended up messing it all up.

So we parted ways. And got together again. And kissed and messed up. And...

It was all happiness until we laid on our backs and our heads were clear enough from lust to understand what we had just done. Then the guilt started spreading until we couldn't bear it anymore.

Then came the goodbyes. They were always rushed and always covered the same old topics. We can't do this anymore, this is wrong and we both know it, let's stay away from each other for a while, for real this time, no one can know about this, about us.

We both knew we were lying. We both knew the cycle would start over again. It was only a matter of time after parting ways to get together, kiss and mess up.

Any of us could have moved out of the city, but we knew that wouldn't stop us. We even tried several times. But we used any excuse to come back, to find each other again, like we always did.

If I had known it was gonna end like this, I would have done something earlier. I would have kept my promise of not reaching out, of staying away.

But, ultimately, we forged our own fate. We loosened our boundaries. We stopped caring about the world. We got caught, our secret came out and we lost it all. We lost our friends, our family, our entire lives.

The last time I saw her there was no life in her eyes. She looked lost. I probably looked lost too. I can't hide my feelings from her. We're sisters, after all, we know each other. But everyone blamed me and I was cast out of everywhere I considered home. And I know she's trapped in a situation with no way out, she can't help me.

I blame myself, too. I was the eldest sister, I should have known better. I know I should have been more careful, I shouldn't have fallen in love with...

With Her. The most perfect woman on Earth. The only girl I've ever had eyes for. And the only one that's forbidden to me.