End Of My World (One -shot)

End of My World

My life only revolves around studying, going home, taking care of our balut retail store and to dream that I'll graduate with honors in order to land on a good job to get a better  future.

In just one snap, my life turns upside down. Its the second semester of my second year in college--my course is Bachelor of Science in Accountancy--when I felt my world broke into pieces. I won't be able to study anymore because of financial problem.

 It's very hard for me to manage my time since I work at the school canteen for four hours straight per day, need to attend all of my five classes until nine in the evening and then I need to stay on our small store near the highway until two in the morning to sell all of our goods. When I got home, my body is already exhausted but I make time to finish studying the three pages of our lecture and two out of ten assignments until four in the morning. I'll need to wake up at seven in the morning the next day because I have two classes scheduled and then I need to go the canteen again.

I put up with it for the last two years to survive but with three major subjects--Financial Management 1, Microeconomics Theory and Practice and Law on Sales, Agency, Labor and other Commercial Laws--and just two to three hours per day won't be enough for me to pass that semester alone. I already knew inside my head that I won't be able to make it to the next semester but I still did my best. Grades came out and as expected, its below retention---3.0.

My routine is still the same, I'll wake up early in the morning to prepare my younger siblings to go to school, went to market to buy ingredients, to cook the meal for the whole day and to sell again at night. I feels like a nightmare everyday. I didn't even notice the days, months and even a year had passed since I last went to school.

Then unexpectedly, I met Michael. He came in during the darkest time of my life. When I felt like I'm a living robot--who wakes up in the morning to do what was told me to do without any question or argument, he made me feel like humane one more time. He makes me feel alive again.

The first few days we're like ridding in a roller coaster--pure bliss during our chat, text and call conversations. I taught I know him well even if we hadn't seen each other yet because I lived in Nueva Ecija and he lives in Parañaque.

I took a crash course of Contact Center Services to land a job as a Call Center Agent. Unlike before, our time was limited now. He wake up at seven in the morning to prepare for work and its the same time for me to go home and sleep. Its getting unfamiliar now but I still make some time to call him before I sleep; I set an alarm to wake up at twelve in the afternoon to call him and before he went to bed at eight.

Christmas break came in and I got lucky to get a three days off and I didn't hesitate to spend it with his family. He's not sweet in person but he managed to hold my hand even if I'm not the person you can be proud off because I'm chubby. He makes my heart flutter every minute he stole a kiss on my lips when  there's someone watching. And those three nights are the most passionate nights I ever had.

I didn't ask my parent's permission on meeting him since I'm twenty three years old and I already know what I'm doing. I was blinded by our love with each other until I got pregnant.

He assured me that no matter what, he'll take responsibility.

Because of hormones, I want to hear his voice during his every vacant times. Our quarrels started from then and it became very often because of petty things and he's got cold feet. I knew he was about to leave me hanging because of the "new friend" he met on facebook.

Devastated was not enough to describe what I felt that time. I don't know how I will tell my parents that they'll have a grandchild on my birthday--as its the Obstetrician's given time for me to gave birth.

For the second time, my world totally collapsed. The feeling of being alive was buried down on the ground again. Before I came to work or sleep and during my free time, I cried secretly to the point that I nearly lost my daughter Jade because of stress.

That's when I had the courage to broke up with him before he does. At least, I'm the one who call it quits at the end. He might be in pain but it's not as much as I'm feeling right now.