Trouble~pjm

The eighteenth

I am uncomfortable when he doesn't speak and just stares. I try to break the silence.
"Well. Hello", I say. He blinks and then chuckles.
"You look divine.", he shrugs. I smile.
"Thank you, why did you call me?", I ask him. It wasn't fake curiosity.
"I wanted to catch up. Ask for forgiveness and maybe be friends. Not all bad intentions you see.", he looked incredibly hopeful. I looked at him.
"Forgive? I'd rather have you out of my life after what you did. I'm sorry.",I said honestly. I could not look past absolute facts that were that he had mislead me. His drunken mistake had caused me a very big decision taken too soon.
"I get that. I am not trying to win you back. I actually..", he reached in his pocket and pulled out a Polaroid. I blinked at the distorted mosaic of black and white spot. I could slowly make out that it was a foetus. It's a sonogram.
I stared at it. I was shocked. What was it? What was it meant to be? I looked to him. Blinking I tried to find any kind of mock on his face but his face was solemn and grateful.
"What is this, Tan?", I asked him. He smiled bright. "It's my child.",he said. Then he looked at me.
I was mesmerised by the turn out of this situation. I smiled. I congratulated him. Not bothering to deal with my feelings when he was living his peak.
"I just want to sort out everything. I just want to tell you and explain to you that everything. This is all thanks to you, indirectly.",he said.
"The company was at its peak and several deals were cracking at my fingertip. My father had asked me to wed into a wealthy household so that we could present a unified front to the world.",he started at the very starting.
"I had recently been with you. You were always dreaming. Always weaving tales to me. I knew then too that you would have to go through pains just to be with me. Dae Kim was my fathers choice. We were to be wed and then you showed up. I was disturbed.  I thought about how I was ruining a perfectly fine life. I tried tracking you but you had disappeared. I was glad. I sorted my life first. I got about to loving dae. She was unbound and wild and ambitious. I fell again. I realised you would've been miserable in a home that wasn't as eventful as you like.", he sighed.
You are right.
He was narrating a tale that my head hadn't woven.
"Then one day Mr. Shin told me about you and how you moved. I thought of how if you hadn't come to Korea. I wouldn't have accepted Dae. I would've loved someone else all my life without even giving her a chance.",he smiled.
"It's not on my accord.", I said, "I fell too. But I won't thank you for that because you had nothing to do with it. I will say you urged me to move forward but I am here because of myself. Though he did heal me. I was just his trouble. But he saw. He looked close enough. I am going to go and make him see that.", I said. Mostly to myself.
"Must be nice to have the Korean heartthrobs be your friends. I thank him too. Effie.", he called me.
"Hmm"
"Can we be friends?", he asked.
I smiled. We could be friends and we could easily live on. Life goes on.
"No.", I smiled and he smiled back as if he knew that my answer was gonna be negative.

|||\|||

I couldn't bare to wait. So I drove straight to jimin's apartment.
Come anytime. I'd love to see you in my home.
I was laughing. Hysteric. There was no villain. It was just a point.
The elevator tinged and I stepped in. Still beaming. I am where I will always be happier.
I was going to go see Jimin and my friends perform their music in the comeback. I'll scream on top of my voice. I'll even buy a army bomb.
I'll one day sit down with Namjoon and just talk to him. Solve riddles and amaze at his incredible IQ.
I'll one day have enough time to go visit suga in his genius lab and gift him a crystal Heart. Then taunt him all day about mine being better.
One day, I'll go shopping with taehyung and then do a photo shoot by the park.
One day I'll stay up all night creating a beautiful dance with hobi. I'll name it hope. And double date with hobi and amber.
One day I'll ask jin to teach me how to cook and how to uphold so much confidence.
One day I'll skip around the dorm house with jungkook and stir trouble for everyone.
I reached the apartment and ring the bell. Jimin opens the door and looks at me. My beaming face. A smile tugs at his lips too.
"Did I win?", he asked.
I just acted on instinct and leaped up on his. I held his face between my palms and kissed him. Because I didn't need a excuse to.
He smiled on my lips and kissed me back. Stumbling back. I held onto him.
One day I'll wake up in different parts of the world with him next to me. Asleep. One day I'll lie down on a picnic blanket next to him.
One day I'll tell him I loved him back
One day I'll do all of it. I'll move past my insecurities and doubts. I'll let go.
He chuckled. I smiled brighter.
"Do you want to eat?", he asked.
"Yes."
"Should've know that it will always be a yes. Though Effie. There's someone who I have to receive from the airport. Come with me?", he took hand.

~~~

The sky brightened.