These poems came from the heart but i really would like you opinion on them, please write comments and refer them to people of you think it coudl help them, also if there is a specific topic you would like me to werite about let me know.
~Giving in~
Why in the hell should I try if it always fails,
Why would I set myself up for pain when I can avoid it?
I don't have the power to be able to handle the pain,
The anguish,
Heartbreak can kill and now its killed me,
I'm done, I cant fight anymore,
Im to weak and little,
My knight,
My protector cant take care of me anymore so how can I?
~To much~
Time and time again you say, "God doesn't give you suffering that you cant handle"
Well your wrong,
He can and he does,
My breaking point is here,
I cant try anymore,
I don't have the will to fight after losing so much.
Crap comes my way and all these years all ive done is make myself numb to the pain,
But now my armors gone,
And without a defense how can you have an offense?
~Memories~
You always saved me,
But now you need me to save you and i cant,
How can I act like nothings changed when you dead?
You gave me my life back and now your gone,
My precious memories of you arnt enough,
I want to keep you here but I know I cant,
As my tears flow I feel you slipping away with tear as I slowly realize that you are forever gone from my grasp,
Ive tried to hard to deny the truth but I can anymore.
Only when I die can I have you again
Dealing with it
What happened to us?
We used to talk and laugh but now it's a constant war,
Deadlocked,
Nobodies winning but everybody is losing,
Either sanity or sleep,
We barely cope,
Me better than you,
Sometimes I wonder if one day ill wake up and find you dead,
Or if ill finally give in to my hearts deepest desire and kill myself,
I cant deal like this and neither can you,
Our hearst are way to shattered and scared,
You think you're the only one suffering,
Wrong, we both are you just cant see past yourself.
~Believing me~
Never being heard hurts,
Its like nobody cares or wants to listen even if they can,
They think we are the rock that can never crumble under a lot of strain,
Im a teen,
How the hell am I supposed to deal with tramatic things better than most older adults,
Fact is I cant,
If anything ill do worse,
They difference between us is that I hide feelings better,
I don't have meltdowns publicly unless im at my breaking point,
Like a volcanoe, I can keep quiet,
That is until I need to burst,
But you refuse to see and believe the true pain im in,
~Abu, this is dedicated to you~
You were my sun,
My one big light that kept my world spinning 'round,
You couldn't possibly know how much you have done for me,
How much I love and need you here with me,
But I know I have to let you go,
I understand,
Im ready,
Just don't suffer trying to stay here for me or anybody else,
Im a big girl now, "opening my eyes",
You taught me everything I know,
How to be wise, and charitable,
And being my father when I had none,
You have never abandoned me for anything for any reason,
I never forget what you've done,
You made me pray again,
You gave me my faith,
And that gave me hope, regardless how little,
It was better than having none,
You showed me how to live with light shoulders,
Taking off the weights that had held me down for so long,
I will always love, in this world, and the next.