your boyfriends a slut//zarry

twenty-five

past

harry could tell that everybody hated him. niall and liam were not talking to him, justin was giving him the usual treatment except now he had a reason to hate him.

and zayn.

zayn had cut of all contact with him. harry expected it, and he wasn't planning on reaching out but it still hurt.

he couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. he felt like this was it for him. he was never good enough for having friends and someone like zayn anyway.

he couldn't sleep. the short time he was able to close his eyes, he would be completely overwhelmed with guilt and hate that he would have to get up from bed instantly.

he was avoiding everybody too because he felt like they all knew and were all judging him. he couldn't go on like this.

he caved in to the demands of his loneliness and calls niall on the phone. he's surprised that he answers the phone.

"harry?" niall answers the phone. harry feels like crying at the sound of his old friends voice, remembering how lonely he is.

"niall," he says. "i miss you so much. and i'm so fúcking sorry for ruining everything."

"harry," niall sighs. "i'm not the person you should be apologizing too."

"i've tried," harry says. "he doesn't want to talk to me."

"can you blame him?" niall asks.

"no... how is he doing?"

"not good," niall says. "i heard he hasn't left his dorm room. he's really hurt harry. i still can't believe you cheated on him."

"i can't believe it either," harry admits. "it feels like i'm dreaming. i wish i could take it all back, i hate this niall."

"we all do... i don't think i can comprehend or forgive what you did but, i still care about you. how are you doing?" niall asks.

"niall... i feel so guilty," harry says. "i know i don't have the right to complain because it's my fault, but it really hurts. i can't even imagine how zayn is feeling."

"just imagine how you'd feel if he had cheated on you," niall says.

harry has actually imagined that before. he knew that he would feel absolutely shattered, but he knows he wouldn't show it. he would be mad, but he would brush it up at the end. it's not the same.

zayn is an angel. he could do so much better than harry. he has the purest soul. if he ever cheated on harry, it probably was going to be harry's fault.

harry is tainted. it's a miracle zayn is with someone like him. he's messed up and broken beyond saving. it was only when he was with zayn that he believed he might have a chance, but he ruined that too.

"do you think i should call him again?" harry asks. "he didn't block my number but he isn't responding to my calls and messages."

"i think you should just give him space," niall says. "i needed the space too, and i'm ready to talk to you now. so let him do it at his own pace, i know zayn cares about you so he might still want to keep in contact. but don't have high expectations about it, you still cheated on him after all."

"okay," harry whispers. "i will. thank you niall, i really missed talking to you. i didn't think you'd ever want to talk to me again considering what i did."

"there's nothing you could do that'll make me stop talking to you harry. you're my best-friend," niall says.

"thank you. love you ni," harry says. he feels so relieved that niall didn't completely cut him off.