Running with Scissors

Chapter 7

Sitting on a bench beside a cold lake Nicky looked across at the leafless trees, their naked branches silhouetted against a sky lit with the faint orange glow of light pollution.  In the summer this was one of the few green areas in town and attracted unbelievable amounts of people.  On this cold January evening it was deserted.  Nicky turned as she heard someone approach.

Gary smiled, bending to place a soft kiss on her cheek.  “I was starting to think you had changed your mind about calling.”

“It’s only been three days.”  Nicky smiled. 

“I’m glad you called.”

“So am I.”  Gary reached forward to brush a strand of hair away from her eyes before thrusting his hands into his pockets.  He looked worried. 

“Nic, I’ve got to tell you something before we go any further.”  He paused, unsure how to proceed.  There was only one thing to do, he just had to come out and say it.  “I’m married.”

Nicky stared at him in disbelief.  She imagined herself getting up and walking away without giving him the chance to say anything else; before he could say anything that would hurt her.  Instead she sat in silence.

“We’re in the middle of a divorce.  It’s been over a long time.  We were only married for six months before the split.”

“Why are you telling me?”  She was fighting to keep her voice under control.  Gary took a deep breath and sat down beside her.

“I had to.”  He wished he could explain this properly.  “I had to be honest with you.  I should have told you last week but I didn’t know when the right time to bring it up was.”  Nicky continued to sit in silence. “I mean, do I bring something like that up on the day I met you in the pub?  That seemed a bit unnecessary.  Or do I mention it the second or third time we meet up or at that Christmas party, or when I realise that I like you quite a lot or... I don’t know, there never seemed to be a right time to tell you.”  He realised that he was rambling and paused, taking a deep breath.

“Nic, I don’t know what’s going to happen.  But I had to tell you before we take things any further.  I mean, if we are starting a relationship you have a right to know.  I’m sorry.”  He gently took her hand in his and was relieved that she didn’t pull away from him.

“If you want me to go I’ll understand.”  She didn’t reply. 

Gary desperately wanted to ask her what she was thinking but forced himself to stay quiet and give her some time.  When she finally spoke her voice was so quiet that he barely heard her.

“I don’t want you to go.”  She didn’t know whether it was the right thing to do, but she couldn’t help the way she felt.  Gary gently squeezed her hand.

“Do you want to get out of the cold, maybe find somewhere to eat?”  Nicky nodded.   He moved closer to her, slipping his arm around her waist.  

Nicky pulled away from him slightly as her phone began to ring.  Reaching to her pocket and pulling out the mobile she glanced at the screen.  After reading the ‘number withheld’ message she cut the call off without answering.