Him

May 8

11:52 am 

Leaning against the brick wall that holds the structure of the school. This is where me and Janelle meet everyday for lunch. Pushing the earbud into my ear, I watch as people run off to their own regular spots. Just as "Bad Guy '' by Billie Ellish starts playing, Janelle waves her hand across my tiny phone screen that I'm staring down at. Right as I pull my earbud out she questions, "What's wrong?"

"He likes you! What did you say to him?" I hear my voice getting louder with every word.

"He likes me?" a genuine look of surprise on her face. Another lie, another act. "I didn't say anything, why would you even ask that?" I see the hurt in her eyes - I can't tell if it's real or not - but I don't care. I couldn't stand to look at her anymore, I couldn't see the fake look of hurt on her face. Squatting down, I sling my backpack over my shoulder as I stand up. Putting the earbud back in, I press the play button. Looking at Janelle, I walk away leaving her staring at me. I know she said something, and I'm determined to figure out what she said.

2:07 pm 

Running into class, Mr. Jordan gives me a confused look which I can only guess is because I'm late for the first time in forever. Rushing to my table, I drop my bag on the floor and fall into my chair. Slumping against the chair, I pull out my laptop and open it to a new message from Janelle. Well messageS: You shouldn't have just walked away! BTW I don't even like him as a human being, so I would never "talk" myself up or whatever you think I did! When you cool off and come to your senses, text me. I really am sorry he doesn't like you, but don't try to blame it on me who didn't do anything!

"Mr. J do you need me to do anything?"

"Nope you're already done with everything, just please stay quiet," he replies before going back to his computer.

Looking back at my computer, I reach into my bag to find my little notebook. Opening to my last notes, I start to type them up to keep me busy. I barely got two sentences typed up before the table vibrates for my phone notification. Picking up my phone, I see that I got another DM from him. Opening the message I see: Janelle came up to me and said some very inapproaiate words, do you know why?

And of course, I knew exactly why. I guess I owed her an apology. Even if she doesn't deserve one.

5:01 pm

Knocking my hand twice against the wood door that leads into Janelle's house. Swinging open almost instantly Janelle stands there with an annoyed look, ''What do you want?" she questions. "I'm sorry I messed up," I try to start to plead my case.

"No, you have no right to be sorry. You have no right to say anything to me, I have no words for you. So please leave," she yells before slamming the door in my face. Leaving me staring at the door of my ex best friend.

Turning my back to her house, I take one step towards my house, two houses down. Repeating, "I don't need her," to myself so I wouldn't start crying.