The Feeling

Prologue

ik Sherlock doesn't understand feelings and I was thinking hmm...what if he started to learn how to feel but what if some huge event happened that made him forget everything he had learned because he had no longer cared or had no reason to. So here's the story

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Sherlock had a lover once, his name is not of importance at this moment. Sherlock had loved him. He loved everything about him from his brown eyes to his black hair.

As everyone in this fandom knows Sherlock is addicted to drugs, his lover kept him away from it very much like how John did. Sherlock learned how to feel when he was with his lover. He was everything to Sherlock. All Sherlock need was him and everything was to be fine. That all changed when Sherlock lover went on a case without Sherlock's knowledge.

Sherlock's lover had walked into 221b like he always did and walked over to Sherlock who was currently sitting on the couch eyes closed, knees to his chest, hands in the prayer position.

"Hello Love," He had said as he gave him a quick peck on the cheek. Sherlock opened his eyes to look at his lover.

"What was that for?" Sherlock asked

"What do you mean?"

"You had put your lips to my cheek, why?"

"It's a sign of affection Sherlock, I'm showing you affection"

"Oh, I apologize"

"The great Sherlock Holmes apologizing the world must be ending" His lover smirked as he went to the kitchen to open the fridge only to find eyes in the milk gallon instead of actual milk. He put the gallon back and went to grab the kettle, filled it and put it on the stove. He walked to the living area and sat in front of Sherlock across from him.

"So what were you thinking about before I came in?"

"The new case Graham gave me"

"One his name is Greg and Two still?"

"Yes, still" Sherlock answered ignoring the first statement.

"Do you need help with it?"

"No."

"Oh come on Sherlock you never let me go on cases please just this once"

"No no absolutely not"

"Why not?"

"Because if something happens and I'm not there you can seriously get hurt" He said quietly.

"Sherlock I won't get hurt I promise"

"The answer is still no and that's final"

"Fine you want to be like that then be like that William" His lover said. He heard his lover walk back into the kitchen to get the kettle that was screaming Bloody Mary.

Sherlock knew he was angry with him but he did not want him to get hurt. Sherlock cared to much. Sherlock would let his emotions take over when he was with him. He would not think correctly. That's why on that day Sherlock had overlooked what his lover was up to.

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Sherlock was face to face with the outlaw. The outlaw had a gun aimed right at him. It was just Sherlock inside the building along with the family involved with the case behind him, backup was on the way he knew that but he was inpatient.

Sherlock had tried to find a way to get away without the outlaw shooting him but everything he had thought of ended up him getting shot anyways.

"Look I don't want to hurt you I just want what's rightfully mine"

"And your not going to get what's "rightfully yours" especially with me in-between this family" Sherlock was bluffing he had no idea what to do. He could break the chair to distract him but it was to far and of he were to move the outlaw would have a clear shot of the family.

Both men heard the door open and here waltz in Sherlock's lover. Sherlock had no time to scold him for his idiocy then the outlaw had took the chance to shoot Sherlock but his lover had rammed the criminal to the floor. The bullet had hit him in the leg. Sherlock had collapsed to the ground as he watched his lover and the criminal had struggle for domince. Sherlock had turned his head to the family.

"Run" He told the family, he watched them scramble up and run for the door and that's when he heard it another gun shot. His lover collapsed on top of the criminal. The criminal pushed him off and ran. Sherlock at this point didn't care all he was thinking about was his lover. After a good minute Sherlock had finally reached him, he checked for a pulse and put pressure on the wound.

"Everything's going to be ok, alright, everything is going to be fine" Sherlock had kept on rambling trying to keep his lover awake. He tried his best to think on what to do but he couldn't his mind froze. Sherlock had let a couple tears fall

"Sherlock"

"Yes"

"I'm not gonna make it,"

"No you are going to make it you have-"

"Sherlock, listen to me," he had got Sherlock to quit rambling "promise me that your going to move on"

"No, no your going to make it I- you-" Sherlock was holding his lover and was full on crying now.

"Sherlock, I love yo-" His lover had finally took his last breath. Sherlock had heard the sirens

"No, NO, Hey keep your eyes open the paramedics are outside" He said. "Please" He had said desperately cluching onto his lover. "I love you too,"

Sherlock had heard Lestrade and the rest of the crew come in. They had tried to take his lover out of his grip but Sherlock just wouldn't budge. After a while he had let go and had been led to a paramedics car. He was in shock, his lover was dead, he could not hear what they were asking him not one thing the only thing on his mind was his lovers lifeless body. Eventually Athena had turned up and took him to Mycroft. Sherlock had been seated in Mycrofts living area. It had been a good 15-20 minutes later when Mycroft walked in.

"Why so upset brother?" Mycroft had asked. Sherlock had took a moment to answer.

"He's gone Mycroft"

"Who is gone?"

"He's gone" Sherlock reapeated.

It finally clicked for Mycroft. He knew who Sherlock was talking about. He usually doesn't show much affection towards his younger brother but today was an exception. He had sat down and wrapped his arms around his younger brother.

"Everything will be....fine," Sherlock had finally broke, sobs wracked his body and he cried into his brothers suit.

After the incident they had a funeral for his lover and Sherlock had went back to cigarettes and drugs. He had buried himself in work. He had missed him with all of his heart and he did not care what people had to say about his behavior.

That all changed when one day he was at the morgue and an ex-army doctor with a horrible limp and grayish blonde hair came in.

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Criticize my writing you cowards
- Max