The Ramblings of an Anonymous idiot (and a not so good guide to Greek Mythology)

I have not breathed nor will I ever choose to

I have never breathed.

Not once in my small abysmal life have I ever sat on a buildings roof top and gotten drunk off the air, vibrant with the city smells. Never have I lay in a field, rubbing grass between my fingers, slowly breathing in the misty nights air of the country. I shall not breathe on a long car ride home from the beach, nor will I inhale when a book has a dramatic plot twist.

And yet, here I am. Existing.

Isn't it a ludicrous take on existence? To say that something can live without breathing is perfectly logical, however to suggest that I, the person typing this out right now, am not breathing or that I have never taken a breath is rather ridiculous. Yet, I must persist that I have not. And if I had? How could you prove it? You do not know me nor do I know you. The anonymity of the internet provides shelter for all those who roam its empty expanses of media. To you, I am nothing more than the text on your screen. You may try to imagine a person hovering behind the other side of these letters, carefully crafting sentences by click clacking a silly little keyboard. So who do you imagine? I like to think you imagine me as a hidden part of yourself. Perhaps in the way of desire, for you to look alike me or for you to know someone who looks alike what you're envisioning.

I've been told people don't like it when you break the fourth wall in a non-comedic way. Ruins the magic. Makes them uncomfortable when they think about another person behind the screen. It's because we love being individuals, right? Wooo. The thought of other people existing, people having the same trains of thought and doing all those weird habits you have at home in private, is oddly uncomfortable.

Anyways what was I talking about? Oh right, never breathing. That's all. I have never breathed and I never will.

...

You're still here?

If so, that's rather interesting. Why continue to read the work of someone who has presented you with the illogical take that they have not breathed? Surely it is not because you are waiting for the Greek mythology part of this story. In the end? Why, this is a story about me. Of course, it is me under a different alias.

Achlys.

That's the Greek mythology part. I could not write as honestly and freely as I can right now if I used my real name. Funny thing isn't it? Even with the name Achlys I cannot breathe.

Also, if you don't know who Achlys is, don't search it up. I'll tell you who she is to me in the future. You'll find out who she is in the coming chapters and to tell you now if you don't already know would ruin some of my stories charm.

This chapter, despite its strange lay out, is not about Achlys. It is about Khaos, sometimes known as Chaos.

Khaos is the personification of nothing in Greek mythology. Makes sense, right? To personify nothing itself.

Khaos was genderless. Khaos was described as a void.

Khaos eventually lead to the existence of everything. We could all learn a thing or two from Khaos, in my opinion.

One;  Khaos was there at the creation of the universe and yet, I could not tell you I had heard of them until about 30 minutes ago during a quick wikipedia search, but I could tell you all about Gods or Titans like Chronos or Zeus.

and also,

Two; from nothing, sprouts something. A lesson that is difficult for people to learn, at least for me. I  struggle to grapple with the idea that nothing can create something.

A void... A chasm...

into..?

Everything.

The  creation of the Universe yet nothing at all. It is like saying me saying I have never breathed. Nothing created everything.

It also has a deeper meaning. From nothing, came about the existence of everything. A nobody who has the ability to be somebody.

Do you think of yourself as a nobody or a somebody? And if you knew the definitive answer was nobody, would you want to change it? I am a nobody. I self-identify with it. I resonate with it, if you will.

If I was to ask a friend of mine they would come to me and plead their case to me that this is false. It makes me sound narcissistic to say I know my friends would say with certainty that I am not a nobody but it is the truth. It would make them the asshole if they didn't and I pick my friends wisely enough to avoid them now.

I love my friends but I must insist that if I approached them seriously they would come to my aid.

"No! Don't say that, Achlys. You're not a nobody, I love you and don't want you to think that way. Please don't ever think that. To me, you're somebody so try not to think you're nobody, for me?"

And numbly, I would nod and blink my little eyes and mumble a response,

"Okay." I would say, "Sorry for that."

I've done plenty of empty apologies before, what's one more.

"I am so sorry for forgetting to do the homework."

and "I'm so sorry I'm late."

"I'm sorry for spamming you about this."

"Sorry for existing in your company too much."

"Sorry."

Hell was I talking about? Ah, righty. Khaos.

Khaos can be over looked in Greek mythology but was the first to emerge at the creation of the universe. Khaos is stronger than the king of gods, Zeus. Wild, right? Big man Zeus, king of gods. Who is he to the one that existed at the beginning of the universe? Weak.

Sometimes the one who wears the crown is undeserving. Sometimes the crown does not belong to the one with the most manifestable power. Sometimes, the hierarchy is not perfect. The most deceitful are either the ones who prosper or perish the most and to decide which one, it is the luck of a coin flip. This isn't me calling Zeus undeserving or saying that he is deceitful (I'm not trying to get smited here, believe it or not) but rather me saying that power does not always belong to who you would expect.

Also, if you haven't figured it out yet, I don't know much about Greek Mythology. I'm figuring it out as I write. This is less a Greek Mythology lesson, more a free therapy for me. Sorry kiddos! But hey, you've made it this far which tells me you didn't completely hate my writing style and perhaps you're even endeared by my writings so far. I did write more. I sprawled all my ideas and plans for the future out onto this page and in two swift movements I deleted that all. I locked it into my brain and eventually, bit by bit, you'll figure out my story. An author cannot reveal the entire storyline on the first page. If they do so they are not an author. They do not write books, they write pages. They create small worlds that end as quick as they started.

Until then however, I think that's all I have to say about Khaos. That's my rant for this page.

So Khaos, am I right?

They began as nothing, they created everything. More powerful then Zeus but also more overlooked.

Nothing to Everything.

Nobody to Somebody.

To create things that do not exist. That is true power. To breathe something that has never existed and yet always has.

And because of that, this outlandish idea that from nothing you can create everything, from no air I can breath air. I have never breathed nor will I ever choose to.

fuck, is breathed even the grammatically correct word?