Did Someone Call for a Mechanic?

Abby hadn't known what she was getting herself into that day, when she'd found Raven Reyes in the air duct and later called for a mechanic; specifically, for her.

For a long time, a little over a year now, she had been stuck between a rock and a hard place. Nobody on the Council trusted her after what had happened with Clarke and Jake. She couldn't blame them, but isolation did funny things to people. Until recently, Abby hadn't known what it was to stand in a room filled with people yet feel so alone. Until her daughter had been torn out of her life, Abby had not known desperation. Not like this. It filled her up and ate away at pieces of her soul each day and night until she was a living, breathing shell of a woman continually fighting for something just out of her reach.

She had tried playing by their rules, but had found them to be too stiff and unmalleable for her to make much progress. It was the rules that mattered, not people or their circumstances. The unwavering fealty to the Ark and their rules from the people she had once loved left Abby suffocating. But Raven? Raven had been soft and pliant without asking any questions, which was a refreshing experience mere hours after the Council had taken a vote on the fate of over three hundred of their citizens. Abby had trusted her from the moment Raven had tossed the wristband back to her with an explanation for what was happening on the ground. It was in that moment, Abby knew. She was the one. And ever since that moment, Abby Griffin had confided in Raven Reyes in a way she had not experienced in over a year. The intimacy between two people who had been figuratively fighting against the world was startling, and it was something that Abby hadn't prepared for.

Because the death of Jake and Clarke's arrest had killed her; having to say goodbye to her husband and her son within an hour of one another had pulled every good piece of her soul out through her chest and left her beaten, bruised, and broken. Empty. Just as empty as her home became. There were certain memories a person couldn't forget. Feeling her daughter crumble beneath her grief in her arms as they watched the infinite universe take a piece of their family was something that would haunt her for the rest of her life. It was in that moment that Abby had lost her faith in humanity.

Raven gave her the strength to find hope again. Raven gave her the strength to trust again. It was Raven who had bestowed upon Abby valuable gifts for which Abby would spend the rest of her life trying to pay her back in the wake of the possibility that she had not only lost Jake, but Clarke given they'd lost transmission on her wristband. Abby never had to say a word. Raven just knew.

The first breath of fresh air Abigail Griffin would take in her life would not occur after their last ditch effort in which they came crashing to the ground all clutching one another betwixt screams and cries. No, the first breath of fresh air Abigail Griffin would take in her forty years of life occurred the moment she'd gained Raven's trust. Something had changed in the way Raven looked at her. It was in the little smile she wore whenever they spent time together.

That was back when Abby had been brave enough to look.

The last time Abby had enough courage to look had been the night Jackson warned them. Kane was coming. It was the last time she had enough courage to look at Raven Reyes and see things for what they were, and the second time she resigned that she was going to die.

She'd been nervous the way it was. It was crunch time, and given the lengths she had to go to in order to acquire the part Raven had been searching for to make this drop ship work, they were working on borrowed time as well.

"No matter what happens, you launch that pod," Abby told her then, and knew Raven would be smart enough to read between the lines. "Do you understand?"

Smart, but stubborn.

"I'm not going without you," Raven had insisted, but Abby could be persistent, too.

With glassy eyes, Abby approached her. She was pleading now, with a hand upon Raven's shoulder. "Only one of us needs to get to the ground, Raven. The second you find those kids, you radio back. Three hundred innocent people will die if you don't."

The way Raven's brow creased and the tears that had filled her eyes had broken the last bit of Abby's heart that had survived the grief the past year had brought to her; it was the way Raven's gaze had faltered that caused Abby's soul to ache in a way that had she knew all too well. It was the familiar ache that was ever-present each time she thought about the toll her actions had taken on her family. They were surrounded by monsters, yes, but Abby couldn't help but to spend those sleepless nights wondering: what if...?

"Abby..." Raven had seemed even hesitant to say it. "They'll float you."

Even she struggled to look at Raven, now. A silent huff of laughter fell from Abby's lips when she realized that her life didn't matter. What mattered was the beacon of hope Raven would be for their people... for her daughter. In such a short time, Raven had gained something that Abby hadn't been aware she was capable of anymore. Raven had gained her trust.

When she spoke, she just barely choked back a sob.

"Then they'll float me."

It was Raven who pulled her into a hug after a lingering glance that said so much more than words ever could. Abby welcomed the embrace, clutching onto Raven with the hope that she would understand everything she could not say just yet; all the things that she would no longer have a chance to say. Raven deserved to hear them from Finn once she was safe on the ground and found their people, not from someone who would soon be dead.

Their five minutes were up.

Abby pulled away and their hands found one another as the shared one last moment together. She had to leave before Raven saw her in a way Abby didn't want her remember: broken, and scared. Her voice cracked as she spoke, squeezing Raven's hands, wearing a smile on her lips despite it all. "Tell Clarke I love her."

Raven nodded, and it was as though Abby could feel the immense shroud of darkness that had fallen over Raven and could only hope that it would soon lift as Raven found new life on the ground and presented with it a new hope for their people. With a final squeeze to Raven's hands, Abby went off to face Marcus and the guards as the tears finally beat her will and began to fall and streak down her cheeks; she went off to face her imminent death. And, as Abby exited Sub 3 of the Mecha Station for what would be the last time, she felt the burden she'd been carrying for over a year finally lift from her shoulders.

She would die, yes. But she would die having found the strength to be someone that she could be proud of.