the way you'd love her

T E N

GAGE

I gripped the steering wheel, turning to leave Carson's beach house. It was midnight, and we had an hour drive ahead of us. Great. I looked over to Belle quickly, only to see her staring out of the window, as far away from me as possible. Maybe I should've let Miles take her home.

When she said that she had sex with him, my heart dropped. Actually, it felt more like it was ripped from my chest and crushed slowly. Because in the back of my head, I've always had this fantasy about marrying Belle. It's so stupid, and I would die before admitting it, but I always thought I would be her first. Then we would have kids. But that's just a stupid dream. Cause in the real world, I don't get Belle. This isn't a stupid rom-com that I would make fun of her for watching. It's real life, sadly.

Guys like Miles end up with girls like Belle. Then, somewhere in their mid-twenties, she gets pregnant on accident and is forced to marry him and has a kid and he cheats on her and they spilt up and maybe she'll regret never going out with her best friend. Or, maybe they'll get married and have a whole basketball team of kids and be happy for the rest of their lives. I like the first option better.

I know I messed up, fucking with Kylie. I knew it from the moment it slipped off my lips that it would be a colossal mistake. But I did it anyways. All because I thought I could distract myself from Belle. That girl is seriously magical. Even when I was thrusting into Kylie, Belle was the only girl on my mind. That's fucked up, but it's the truth.

I needed to stop it with her, seriously. Whatever is going on between us, it needs to stop, before I kill myself trying to refrain from touching her. I tapped on my steering wheel and looked over at her again. I need to put some distance between us. Just so I can cool off for a while. Because seriously, this isn't healthy. This is like, the definition of toxic.

I pull into the Denny's that was ten minutes away, and she finally looked at me.
"What are we doing here?" She asked.

One more night of us. One normal night, and then I'll keep my distance, I swear to myself. I really will. I'll ditch our plans for a while, just until I'm normal.

"You think I didn't hear your loud ass stomach growling back there? I'm pretty sure you only ate breakfast, anyways."
"Screw you. I'm not hungry."
"Fine, you can watch me eat then." I carried her. She felt so natural in my arms.
"I can walk!" She moved against me.
"Grandma Marj walks faster than you."
She fought against a smile, but couldn't help but giggle.

"Okay seriously, put me down before I scream in here that you're kidnapping me." She said. I followed her request, and opened the door for her, bowing. She fake curtsied and walked in, taking a seat at a booth.

The restaurant lighting was so ugly, a yellowy color, but it looked great on her skin. How does she manage to look beautiful every second of every day? I admired her, until our waitress came.

"I'll have a bacon cheeseburger with sweet potato fries and a Diet Coke." Belle said.
"Can I get a honey mustard chicken wrap with some fries and a lemonade please?"
"Sure thang. Y'all make a lovely couple." The waitress, who looked to be about forty, commented. I smiled, and opened my mouth to correct her, but Belle grabbed my hand.
"Thank you ma'am." She smiled. I gulped and almost smacked myself across the face.

How the fuck was I supposed to stay away from this girl?