Keditha's Beloved

Chapter Eighteen

The last few weeks have been an stressful and hectic. Father had me running alot of errands for him. He said something about it being preparation for when I inherit the throne. Though I didn't believe that I'd be becoming queen anytime soon, I didn't mind helping my father. It gave me something to do. A good distraction

I thought Mr. Fenway would die when I had to tell him I wasn't going to be able to attend his classes, but he actually seemed glad that I was taking another step forward into my future as Queen. That or he was glad he didn't have to deal with me anymore.

Whether he was glad I was leaving or not, I'm going to miss him. He taught almost everything I know. He's been teaching me since I was a little kid. I was thankful for his wisdom and how he helped my relationship with Christ.

But I was mostly thankful that father was back on his feet again. He was still sick and weaker than he used to be but he wasn't bedridden and I guess that was a good sign.

My father hadn't mentioned anything about his treaty with Nicholas. I didn't know if he called it off or not. Either way, Philip wasn't here and I could finally breathe easily.

I enter the throne, where my father said he'd be working for the afternoon. Both him and mother were sitting together, talking extremely quietly.

Father looks up at me. A slightly stunned but mostly cheerful look crosses his face. "Athena! I was just going to call for you. We have some news." He says.

"What is it papa?" I ask. I didn't bother taking a seat, I didn't plan on being there long unless papa's had alot to say.

"I got a letter from Cyril. He's invited us to Julian's twenty first birthday. It's in two days." Father says, holding up a letter.

I stiffen. I didn't want to go to Julian's stupid party. Why would I? As far as I could tell, he's dead to me. "And we're going?" I question.

"I know you mentioned things were rocky between you two. But this would be a good time to put these things behind us, me and Cyril included." Father says.

Mother raises an eyebrow. "You're still going to push for the treaty?" She asks.

Father nods, his face had turned serious. "When I'm gone, I want my family to be safe and the best way I can assure that is by ending this stupid war."

Father glances between my mother and I. "There's more news, Cyril has invited the Kingdom of Vikya, so Philip might be there. I know how you feel about him Athena."

I swallow, suddenly feeling very sick. Philip was coming? Why did I always have the worse luck? "When are we leaving?" I mutter, not wanting to know the answer.

"Tonight, that way we'll get there a couple hours before the party. So you'll have a few hours to get prepared." Father sorts through his papers as though he was looking for something.

"Of course!" I say, pulling out my fake cheeriness. "I'll got get ready right away." I curtsy and swiftly make my exit. I needed a break, I need a safe place to go.

And fortunately I knew the right place.

            ____________________

I move the moss vines out of the way, entering the enclosed pond. I breathe in the fresh air, relaxing almost instantly.

I wonder over to the pond, slowly slipping off my heels. I sit down, letting my feet rest in the water.

I can't believe I have to go to the party of that scum. He completely betrayed my trust. I thought...I thought I loved him.

Maybe I still do... No! He doesn't deserve me or whatever love I have to give. I can't wait for all this to be over so I can be rid of Julian and Keditha forever.

But also I should probably think of a way to avoid him. Avoiding the host of the very party you're at will be a difficult task but I'm up to the challenge.

Then there was Philip, avoiding him will be even worse, if he's still obsessed with me that is. But I doubt I'm that lucky.

I never am.

I glance around the area, memories come flooding in, as well as tears.

The night I first heard about my engagement and Julian took me here to make me feel better. I might have even loved him back then.

Then When Julian saved me from the bandits and he helped me find my way here. He offered to teach me to dance even though I already did...then we kissed.

Goodness, at first glance our relationship looked like a fairy tale but it was far from that.

Why did he betray me like that? I thought... Ugh I was so stupid to think someone as handsome and charming as he would actually like me.

But didn't he seem genuine? Maybe he was just a really good actor...

I pick a blossom off one of the trees, studying it in my hand. I need to stop this. Thinking about Julian, the what ifs and trying to find a possible way to say that it wasn't his fault, he isn't to blame. I crush the flower in my hand.

But I can't. I can't find any possible excuse for him. Everything he did, everything he said...it was all him and he meant it.

"You need to move on." I mutter to myself. "He doesn't love you so you don't need to love him." I wipe my tears away but they only fell faster.

I sink to my knees, sobbing into my hands. Why didn't he love me? What's so horrible about me?

The more and more I think about this and this horrible, awful situation, the more I realize

No matter what, no matter how hard I tried. Julian had me, he had me wrapped around his little finger.

I was completely in love with him.