Presumed Dead

chapter 10- the incident

I grabbed the journal and went to one of the torn pages, it was at the beginning of the journal. Why was all of the torn pages are at the beginning.

-i am going to start this journal off by writing what happend on what I called the incident, it started with some bully's and I didn't know they were mean at first but after a while, it became apparent they were using me. I told the bullies I couldn't be friends with them, they started to be mean to me after I said that but one of the bullies tried to fight me, I didn't want to fight but something forced me to. I didn't feel in control, I grabbed a metal pole from the side of the road and started going crazy and one of the bullies got very badly injured, I dropped the pole and covered my mouth on what I saw. I ran away from the incident and some of them chased me. The bullies tried to attack me but I blacked out and idk what happend but after I woke up I wasn't where I was when I blacked out, I didn't know where I was.-

"So that was the incident but why am I in this mess," I said, I grabbed the journal but I saw joey holding something but I couldn't see what it was, "chase I won't tell you again you will hand me the journal or you will get hurt" joey yelled. "why do you want the journal so badly joey? It's not like you were in the incident" I yelled back. "the incident in the journal wasn't the incident, I was talking about."

What was joey talking about there was only one incident in the journal? Unless...what happend before the argument was the incident. I started to run and I was out the door and in the woods. "i should be safe here" I whispered. I felt tired so I sat down right next to a tree. I opened the journal and tried to find the incident joey was talking about. I can't seem to find it but then I remember it was before the argument so I went there.

-it happend again, why do I keep losing control? I hurt someone and I didn't mean to, I dont want to hurt anybody. I am getting ahead of myself but after the argument with joey, Penske wanted a meeting with me and joey to talk about being a good teammates and don't fight each other. When I got to the meeting joey was already there. Penske wanted us to talk about who started the argument, so he asked me to go first I told him what happend, and then it was joey turn he told a bunch of bullshit lies and Penske seemed to believe him more than me, I excused myself to go to the bathroom and when I went there I tried to calm down but I started to lose control again, i blacked out and all I remember is someone calling my name i dont know who it was but after I gained control again, I just wanted to cry. I didn't know what happend but someone told me that when I left the bathroom, I went over and attacked joey, they separated him from me and I tried to get him but someone hold me back, once I gained control everyone saw the truth about me and I told Penske that I didn't know what happend, told me to spend some time at home to relieve some of the anger but it didn't work because I wasn't the angry one but someone else was. After that incident, I couldn't stop losing control and blacking out but I tried to do it when I was in a safe area. Then something odd happened, I felt in control for the most part but I saw something in the mirror, it was me but it had dark and soulless eyes. He looked at me and told me that he was there since the first incident and he was the one who was in control of me when I blacked out. I felt upset about this thing that was causing me to be aggressive torse people. I called it the other one, no one saw him, no one can hear him, except me-

So that was the incident joey was talking about Ryan lost control and attacked joey but it didn't explain on why joey wants the journal. This was after the argument either something ain't adding up or something is missing. Then I remembered the ripped page had most of the answers.
So I grabbed the one of the ripped pages and start reading it.

-after the argument with joey and everyone saw who I really was. It was hard not to overhear on what happend even though I don't have any memory of it. The whispers and the gossiping about it. I hated the rumors that came of this, then 2 emails from Penske came in. 1st was addressed to everyone, the 2nd one was addressed to just me...i read the first one it basically just said the incident that happend a couple of days ago should not be public as it could ruin the chances for future sponsors, I was hesitant on reading the 2nd email as I thought I was in trouble. The 2nd email said that he wanted me and joey to work out our issues and said that we should meet a joey's garrage but he won't be there since he has a bunch of meetings to attend. I didn't feel like going because joey might bug me about this journal but I had to go-

It still doesn't make any sense then as I was getting up to go to a nearby bus stop since it was getting late, I found something under the leaves and sticks, I bend over and found a VHS tape.