Thank You Cisco

Tomorrow is Never Promised

      I thought you would be there forever. I thought that the reason the universe kept bringing us back to each other was because we were meant to be together, but you helped me see that you were just meant to be a chapter in my life when I needed you most. You showed me what it felt like to love myself and that, in return, taught me how to love Dominic the way he should be loved.
      You fell in love with another... with your true soulmate. I wish you nothing but happiness and for it to be everlasting.
      After our break up in high school, my life became a whirlwind that spun out of control and took me to rock bottom. I let myself fall back into a dark hole and embraced the comfort of the darkness once more. There were other lovers after you, but they too came to pass. I finally gave up after Lucas, but when Dominic came into the picture, I felt something different. No matter how much I tried to lie to myself that he too would be just a phase, he showed me otherwise. No matter how hard I tried to push him away, he stayed. Something you couldn't do for me, or maybe you could have but didn't want to.
      Before Jasper, you came into my life unexpectedly and for a brief moment in time, I felt hope. I felt destined for happiness finally. I felt that God had seen all the heartaches I suffered in my life, romantically and non- romantically, and finally granted me the warmth of serenity when I was in your arms. My safe haven. However, I didn't let go of those heartaches and I let them hold me back from truly loving you by not being fully trusting in you. That's how I lost you the first time.
      When I finally started dating Jasper, I guess a big part of me knew deep inside he wasn't meant to be my soulmate either. He too was just a chapter that came to pass. A lesson to keep in my heart. I still thought about you, night and day, remembering the letter I wrote to you. The letter pouring out my heart and soul to you about how I truly felt about you. To no avail, you still kept your distance... I guess it all makes sense now.