Swinging Tire

14

The day after the night before.

Axl rolled down the bed, palming Izzy's side of it. He felt tears welling on his throat, but swallowed them down with a gulp of water through sheer force of will.

The last thing he needed was Izzy's questions if he saw him crying, so he threw the curtains open and had a look at the gloomy sky in front of him. Izzy was in the shower,and he was giving it all in a quite impressive Bon Scott impersonation of Highway to Hell.

"Your dick," thought Axl, "You couldn't hit the highs if your life depended on it."

"What were you saying, Axl?"

"Nothing."

He didn't realized he was speaking out loud. Wherever before it was babe, sugar, darlin, now he was just that. Axl.

His mind raced, he had to pinch the bridge of his nose and take a deep breath, otherwise he feared losing control , either killing the cheating motherfucker with his bare hands and send both their lives to hell, or be reduced to a pathetic, whimpering excuse of a man, not much better than a girl asking for explanations and excuses and promises of never ending love.

And he would never beg. Not to Izzy, not to Slash, not to anybody.

No, fuck him.

But then he'd take one look at Izzy and all his pride would go through the drain, leaving him with a pain so acute it bordered insanity. He understood him, he forgave him, and he'd forget him, even if hell froze in the way.

"I'm going out for a walk, see you at six? For rehearsal?" Axl didn't say anything , just offered his cheek for the chaste kiss Izzy planted on it, inhaling his freshly washed aroma, the hint of aftershave only contributing to the vault he felt on his chest.

When the door closed behind Izzy, he picked the phone. Duff was dutifully posted by Slash's room, and Axl didn't even needed to ask when Duff called to say he saw movement.

In his heart, he already knew it.

*****

Izzy could hear the bass beat on the hallway of the studio, way before they reached it's door. They had already started, he looked at the clock on the wall and was surprised to read it well past eight o'clock, and sighed. Time always flew when you're having fun, and now Axl must be fucking pissed. What's new.

Slash had already slung his guitar around his neck and was catching the riff, and as West was playing rhythm , he tough to sit down and enjoy it from the grades for a change.

The song came to an end and Steven took a gulp of water. Steven, drinking water?

"Hey, Steven , man, are you drinking fucking water? At eight o'clock?"Izzy let out with a chuckle.

"Hey man."

Steven seemed uncomfortable and kept fidgeting with his drum sticks. Interesting, thought Izzy. He watched as Axl, Duff and West bantered,and was getting his guitar tuned when Axl proposed a cover for their next show. Here we go, Izzy though, another fucking exentricity from his nutcase lead singer.

"And that would be?" Izzy asked with a pick between his teeth.

"Ah, just a Queen song."

"A Queen song?" Izzy felt his insides twist. He gave Slash a quick look, but Slash was busy pouring whiskey into Steven's water bottle,and Steven was on his turn, promptly guzzling it.

"Yeah. Give it Duff."

When the bass started pounding, Izzy recognized "Another One Bites TheDust", and then Slash did looked a bit alarmed. Izzy made an almost imperceptible sign at him, a sign that said, "be cool, they don't know."

They don't know he thought, and he ought to feel guilty, but strangely enough, guilt didn't seem the word for it.

West pounded into it too, and Slash was relegated to watch, elbow propped on the amp.

They don't know it, he repeated to himself, they don't know it, he kept repeating, even when his stomach was crawling with fear seeing the fire on Axl's eyes and the way he sang looking at him.

Axl turned to Slash then, and walking with a dangerous spring on his step, sang right on his face, "are you happy? are you satisfied? How long can you stand the heat?"

Izzy saw Slash's face go green. It would had him laughing in any other circumstances, but now Axl was coming for him.

"There are plenty of ways that you can hurt a man

And bring him to the ground

You can beat him, you can CHEAT him

You can treat him bad and leave him while his down."

Axl kicked his chair then, sending Izzy sprawling across the room, but never missed a beat, and managed to finish the song, sweat running down his face.

"Axl."Izzy run his hand through his hair. "Axl, babe, what'swrong?"

Axl let out a maniac's laugh. He put the mike on it's stand, and when he turned, Izzy read the truth on his face, the truth he was so foolishly trying to believe he didn't know. They both knew it. Duff's face was set in stone, Steven had all but disappeared behind the drums, West had vanished from sight.

Axl pulled Izzy to his feet.

"Do you know what's wrong with me, Izzy? You. YOU are the wrong thing with me."

"Axl, I.."

"Don't ever talk to me again, Izzy. Don't call me, don't address me, don't mention me."

Izzy felt rooted on the spot. He looked briefly at Slash's face, and what a pitiful sight it was.

"Common Axe. Lets get the fuck outta here." Duffs voice was but a tender whisper, and Axl let himself be guided to the door, not before spitting at Izzy's feet.

"You are as good as dead to me, Stradlin. As good..." His voice failed then, and Duff finally had him out of the door.

"Axl Axl" Slash was heaving on the floor, green bile spurting out of him, crawling on his own mess, face contorted.

"I'm sorry, Slash, I'm so.."

"Fuck you Izzy! I fucking hate you! Oh my God! What have we done?"

Izzy turned for the door then. He could hear Steven trying to get Slash on his feet, "come on buddy, lets get you cleaned."

He could still hear Slash's voice by the elevator.

"Axl , Axl! Come back baby!"

"Axl!"

"I love you!"

"Axl!"

Slash sounded like a fatally wounded animal.

As good as dead, Izzy though.

I am as good as dead.