Chapter 5

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Lara dragged a hit from her joint and released the smoke into a perfect ring, watching as its white edges lost shape the closer it drifted to the blue-colored ceiling, until it dissipated and only a thin mist lingered.

A smile crept on her lips, though it tasted bitter as she shifted her gaze to the empty spot next to her. Inside her chest, maggots munched away at her heart. Or at least that was what it felt like.

The walls weren't painted over. Years ago, Sam had covered the sad hanging lightbulb in the shed with a blue globe that washed the rotting, brown wood with a more lively color. The change remained only on the surface, though. Lara related.

When she had stepped inside after so long, it was like traveling through time. Even as she touched the door, the scratches marring it remained familiar under her fingertips. It was funny, the way the human mind treasured such superfluous sensations for years, or a lifetime. The memories and feelings from a decade ago crashed against her in waves, each triggered by small details that somehow had etched themselves deep into her skin long before she knew they'd become important to her. They kept rising and falling, leaving her breathless and allowing her just enough room to breathe between one and the other so she wouldn't drown.

Lara fiddled with a corner of the blanket she was lying on, surprised moths hadn't gotten to it, nor to the pillows. The bright colors of the materials had faded to dull ones, and dust permeated every fiber, but they still held heat and comfort. Against all expectations, the wooden shed stood the test of time. She suspected a dead animal lay somewhere under the floor—and that might be half the reason she spent most of her nights smoking—but the rain didn't get in and it kept the wind away, so that was good enough for Lara. Chances were she wouldn't need this place anymore by winter, anyway. Another pang shot in her chest. Lara closed her eyes and waited for it to pass.

There was nothing else in the cramped two-by-two space besides a couple of old posters on the walls with some stupid boy bands they used to like.

As Lara released another ring into the air, another wave crashed against her.


"How the fuck are you doing it?" Lara asked and passed the joint to her friend. She watched as her ball of smoke dissipated into the air.

Sam smirked, puffing a perfect smoke ring right into her face. "Professional's secret."

If Lara didn't have something more important on her mind, she would've given Sam shit about it. She contented herself with a huff instead and let a few moments pass before speaking. "I think I have a crush on Natalie."

Sam's eyes burned into the side of her head. "Na-... Our Natalie?"

"Yeah..."

Lara held her breath as she waited for Sam's reply, gaze stuck on the ceiling.

"Now, it makes sense."

With a frown, Lara propped herself up on her elbow and finally looked at her friend. "What makes sense?"

Sam sat up, passing her the joint with a smile. When Lara didn't reach for it, the girl dragged another hit.

"You never seemed interested in boys, like I am. You called our jocks an ugly and stinky pack of mutts once."

"They are stinky, and travel in packs," Lara defended herself with a laugh.

"And you like girls."

"That's right."

"Okay." Sam lay back down.

"Ok? That's it?" Lara asked, bemused.

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