Night Changes- Larry Stylinson- Sequel to Thinking Out Loud

Untitled Part 1

Louis POV

I lie awake in bed, listening to the rain poor down outside. Watching as the drops make shapes across my window. I haven't spoken to Harry in eight days, since I left. His attempts at calling me have failed; I refuse to talk to him. My emotions are all over the place at the moment. I'm trying to deal with the realisation that Jake was Ben's Boyfriend. Jake knew all along whom I was, I feel so stupid I didn't recognise him. I probably met him nearly half a dozen times while I was friends with Ben, they dated for two years. I know it must have been a big shock for Jake when he found out what Ben did to me, and that he overdosed and died. I understand he is upset about his death, but. Jake has a husband and two children now, he seemed to move on pretty quickly. Doesn't he understand that Ben raped me and nearly killed me? I had nothing to do with his death. The fact that Jake is still defending him is a little insane. Why would he want to be associated with him?

I don't blame Harry for what's happened, in any way at all. I love him with all of my heart and I always will. I now know he didn't cheat on me with Jake, that the whole ordeal was set up. Harry sent Zayn a recording of Jake confessing to everything! Hoping he could get me to listen to it. I refused at first, but Zayn made me listen to it, and as I'd always known, it proved Harry's innocence. The fact that he kept it from me though, that he didn't trust me enough to tell me what Jake was doing to him really hurts. I was so confused. I thought Harry was in love with Jake. It seemed like when something went wrong they would run to each other, and that is what I'm really upset about. Apart from the recording I haven't let Harry explain anything, I will, just not now.

I turned up on Andy and Zayn's doorstep when I left Harry. Of course they welcomed me with open arms. They have been great like always, and I’m so grateful they are leaving Harry and I to sort this mess out ourselves. The last thing I want is the three of them to have a falling out over me and my issues. I've told Aston that we are having a visit with Uncle Andy and Uncle Zayn and he hasn't questioned me further. He does miss Harry and Darcey though. I miss Darcey like crazy, but I just don't know where to go from here. I have so much baggage and it's not fair to Harry to have to stand by me while I sort it all out. Losing our baby has made it all so much worse and I'm dealing with so much. I feel like I want to explode. I refuse to let anyone see I'm not coping, I cry and breakdown when I'm alone.

My phone buzzes beside my head and as I pick it up, I see the time says 10:30pm. I've been lying awake now for 2 hours. It's another message from Harry.

Harry: Baby talk to me please I can't lose you, you need to come home to me

 

I sigh. As much as I want to go home and lye in Harry's arms, I'm still hurting. He deserves the world. Someone who doesn't come damaged already. I do decide to text him back though he deserves that much from me.

Louis: Harry I want to come home, but you deserve so much better than me and you know it's true. Maybe it's for the best

Tears come to my eyes as I write the words. As much as Harry deserves more than me, I still can't help but want to be with him and love him. I'm so confused right now. The night drags on and I don't fall asleep at all. I watch the sun rise through my window, thoughts continuously rolling around my head. The clock says 7am before I get up. I've been wearing Harry's black T-shirt to bed for the past week, it stills smells like him and I'm always reluctant to take it off. I shower and dress in my skinny jeans and a tight black hoodie with my vans. I brush my hair and leave it flat against my forehead. When I look in the mirror I can't help my negative thoughts. I sigh and exit the bathroom. I walk slowly downstairs into the kitchen.