My Brother's Bestfriend

Chapter 29

I don't feel like going. Ugh! Why do I have to go? I hate this. I started dressing up. I put my hair down, naturally. Also, I didn't wear any make up, except for my lip gloss, and I wore a pink and white floral beach dress. After getting ready, I went on my way down the beach. There were alot of people. A dj is on a small stage, then there were lights everywhere. Stand tables and few beach chairs on the side. Everyone was just partying. The music is so loud too. Then theres a huge long table on the left side, with different kind of food, like snacks and drinks.

"Hey!" greeted Sierra. For a second, I didn't notice it was her, until she came closer to me, giving me a hug.

"How are you?" I asked her with a huge smile on my face.

"Im good. It's been a while since we last saw each other, how are you?" she asked me.

"Im doing great!" We continued to talk for a while, until she had to go to the washroom, so she excused herself. I stood in the crowd by myself, looking around me. When I saw Cameron by the stand table near the dj with Rachel. I knew it, they'll be together. Come on Ashely, use your mind. He seems so happy from far away though. I just hate the fact that even though I keep telling myself Im happy, the truth is I am not.

Why can't I be happy?

I walked myself to the table where Finn was standing with the other guys. "Hey Ash," greeted Jayjay.

"Let's dance?" asked Finn while pulling my hand. I couldn't reject his invite because we were already standing on the dance floor. At first I felt shy, but when the music started turning up, my body just went with the flow. It feels like Im shaking the bad vibes off, and it was all just good vibes left. Me and Finn were grooving along the music. He was behind me, while his hands were on my hips. I could feel his body, following the flow of mine.

Until someone bumped onto me. And the first person I saw was Rachel. "Im so sorry," she apologized. She tried to touch me but I pushed her hands away, and I felt Finn interlacing his fingers into mine.

"Please don't make a scene," said Cameron. I felt my face burning into madness. I mean, why would he tell me not to make a scene. Im not the one who started acting like a bitch. I am not a bitch, and I will not try to be one.... but once someone crosses the line, they will see how much a bitch I could be. I tried saying "It's okay" but no words came out, I just started walking away from them. Finn and I went back to the table, then he went to the bar side to get me a drink.

"You alright?" asked Nash. "You look really pissed," he added.

"Im fine," I replyed. I was already having fun, why does she have to ruin everything for me? If she wants to have fun by ruining mine, she got to stop. Because I won't back out to her. I won't let her ruin my vibes again.

After few hours of being at Cameron's party, I started getting bored. So I decided to take a walk down the beach. You could still hear the music far away from the party area. It's actually nice to have an outdoor party, rather than a indoor one. There's more space, and it won't get crowded. I walked more farther where I could barely hear the music anymore. Maybe Im just trying to find peace, in a quiet place. Even though It's not that quiet. I took a sit on the sand, just staring on the ocean, and up, above, the sky. I closed my eyes, and I just enjoyed the wind crashing into my face, the sound of the music mixed into the sound of the breeze and the crashing waves. And Im just trying to relax myself, trying to forget the problems that caused me pain.

I felt someone sitting beside me, and I eventually looked, when I saw Cameron looking at me directly. "Can I join you?" he asked.

"What are you doing here, Cameron?" I fussed. "Can't you see Im trying to be in peace right now? Why do you have to ruin everything for me?"

"Im not ruining everything for you," he says. "In fact, Im not even trying to."

"Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend right now?" I asked him rolling my eyes, but he didn't notice since it was dark. He started laughing, and I got really pissed, so I stood up. But, then he pulled my arm too strong, too strong that I fell on top of him. My face and his were too close to each other, that I could see his eyes directly, even though it was dark. His eyes were filled with sadness. Why would he be sad? He looks really happy, he could even manage to burst into laughter.

"Rachel is not my girlfriend," he said.

"What?" I said, pulling myself up.

"I never dated Rachel when you left," he said. "We just became close friends again, but it was nothing more than that," he explained. I couldn't say anything, because I don't know what to respond. I was just staring at him, while he was standing up. He took my hands and said, "I still love you."

"Don't joke around here," I told him, pushing his hands away.

"Im not joking," he said.

"Why would you act like she was your girlfriend? Did you do that because you knew I was gonna get hurt?" I yelled at him, as I started crying. "I hated both of you because you kept on breaking my heart into pieces!"

"I'm sorry Ash."

"You can't just say sorry, and expect me to accept your apology! Don't you realize how many times I cried for you? I couldn't stop thinking about you! I couldn't find peace in myself because of you!" I said while pushing him. He started comforting me, holding my hands, and wrapping his one arm around me.
"And you know what's worst?" I cried out. "Afterall what I've been through, I still love you," I added. I do. I still love him. "Seeing you with her, was already hurtful. Seeing you laughing and smiling because of her was twice hurtful. I was jealous of her, because I thought you loved her more. I thought you forgot about me that easy. I don't even know If I should be happy because now I know that you still love me. I tried telling myself to be happy for you, I acted like everything was fine. But it wasn't. It wasn't fine at all. I wasn't happy for you. Yet, I still love you!"