TATTOO

Chapter Seven: Butterfly.

Regret.

It was one of the worst feelings to experience. By definition, it embodied a poor decision. Jungkook had convinced himself, that somehow, this was the right thing to do. To fulfill the last wishes of his dying boyfriend. Unfortunately, life has a habit of reminding him that his choices aren't always the best. Things had been up and down. The trip was fun, it was nice to see Jimin smile, laugh and glow like the beautiful person he was. But things could never be so simple, so easy. With each day that passed, with each moment that Jimin pushed himself past his limits, things got worse. On the last day of the trip, Jungkook somehow knew – this was it. Jimin was sick, terribly so, but refused to go to the hospital. Instead, he begged and pleaded with Jungkook not to let his last moments be in that cold, white room he'd become so familiar with. Jimin wanted his final moments to be spent in the arms of the man he loved, in a warm and comfortable place. Jungkook struggled, his heart and mind battling it out, logic and reason versus compassion and love. Jimin asked him to take him to the beach instead of the hospital. Jungkook's mind was screaming at him. No, no, no! Take him to the hospital. But his heart, seeing Jimin's eyes wide and desperate made Jungkook's logical resolve disappeared. That was how he found himself sitting on the warm sands of a local beach in Osaka. The gentle, warm breeze passing over them as the sound of the waves was almost a soothing comfort. Jungkook looked down at Jimin, relaxed against him. His arms loosely wrapped around the other as he buried his face into the top of Jimin's hair. Jimin's half lidded eyes staring out at the ocean as the sun slowly started to set, painting the sky a beautiful mixture of orange and pink.

"You, okay?" Jungkook asked, closing his eyes.

"Mm." Jimin replied, tilting his head a little.

"Are you...sure about this Jimin?" Jungkook asked, nuzzling his face against the soft locks that tickled his skin.

There was a moment of silence and instantly Jungkook's heart started to race in panic. Not yet. That was all his mind could scream at him, but a subtle shift from Jimin calmed him as the older male tilted his head back to look up at Jungkook's face. A tired smile across his lips, the brightness of his brown eyes a little faded. It is almost time. Jungkook swallowed as Jimin raised his hand with all the strength he could muster and brushed his fingers against Jungkook's cheek.

"I'm sure. This is perfect." Jimin said, his hand slipping but Jungkook caught it and at the same time revealed the butterfly tattoos that decorated both of their wrists.

One drawn by Jimin on Jungkook's and one drawn by Jungkook on Jimin's. The difference was clear, but Jungkook cherished it more than anything. He could still recall Jimin's hand shaking, the needle's prickle and Jimin's apologies, but the proud smile he gave after made the pain worth it. Jimin was worth it. Jungkook leaned down, their lips close as he did his best to hold back the tears forming in his eyes.

"I'm not ready to say goodbye." Jungkook whispered.

"Me either." Jimin said, a few tears slipping from the corners of his eyes.

Jungkook pushed their lips together. The kiss was soft but full of passion. It was full of love and desperation. It was their last kiss. Jungkook pulled back slowly as Jimin rested against him, his eyes closed as his face rested against Jungkook's chest. He was still, the fading of his breathing and the slow beating of his heart was enough to let Jungkook know. Jungkook let his tears flow freely as he wrapped his arms tightly around Jimin's smaller frame, curling around the other as he sobbed loudly. The sun set and it was over. Jimin was gone. No more pain, no more struggling. Jimin was at peace. Jungkook rocked the two of them back and forth as his mind played through these last months with Jimin. Jimin had made more of a difference in him in their short time together than anyone else. Jimin saved him. The ambulance was eventually called, the police came. But none of that mattered to Jungkook because he gave Jimin what he wanted most – to feel alive. Their short, but passionate love. The laughs, smiles and intimacy of a relationship. Jimin didn't have to die alone, feeling unloved or unwanted. Jungkook was able to offer that gift to him in return for saving him.

Even as Jungkook stood among Jimin's friends and family at the funeral, he felt a sense of relief. Using one arm to hug Taehyung, hugging the other against him as he sobbed. His gaze would meet that of Jimin's father and the two would share an unspoken understanding of gratitude. Jungkook stepped forward, pulling out the singular white rose from the safety of his coat. Setting a top of the red ones that everyone had placed. Jungkook remained kneeled down as he brushed his fingers along the white casket and offered a sad smile, he brought his fingertips to his lips and then back to it. A small part of him wanted to join Jimin, but he knew that wasn't what the other wanted. They had talked about it, Jungkook had told Jimin he wouldn't live without him, but Jimin's scolding and sad expressions of how that was silly, reminded him that Jimin's memory can only live on through the people that knew him. Jungkook stood up as he stepped back, and he closed his eyes as more tears started to fall as he tilted his head back and let out a shaky breath.

Jungkook slowly opened his eyes and they widened as he saw something flutter by. Jungkook's expression softened as he couldn't help but smile as he saw it.

A singular butterfly.