Definitely Fonder (C Duology #01)

C Duology #01: Definitely Fonder

        I don't know, actually. Nagkaro'n lang ako ng idea nito. . . no'ng nag-post ako sa Facebook na gusto ko na namang magsulat ng story about college exes (haha). under that post, I shared a picture of my list of prompts. I realized I have lots of prompts unused. somehow, I thought I had very little time. That isn't the case, of course. Because I always find time to write stuff. By "stuff," I mean stuff that isn't related to the program I'm currently studying.

        But perhaps I'm just using time as an excuse to write this. . . even if I'm aware I don't have to. Kasi nga oras ko naman 'to. [bumuntonghininga] I'll just go straight to the point — I'm very much like one of the main characters here.

        Like her, I feel guilty whenever I take a break. I feel a weird knot in my stomach when I try to do something for myself. Kapag nanood ako ng series kahit may pending akong gawain, may inkling kaagad sa utak ko na dapat makahabol ako. Na dapat marami akong matapos para maging deserving ako sa pahinga.

        I know I shouldn't feel that way but I just can't help it. Ganun lang ata talaga kapag masyadong self-aware; kapag masyadong mataas ang expectations sa sarili.

        Laurie and Lee both needed to sacrifice things to get where they want to. So, maybe this book is an ode to their sacrifices. maybe this is for my current and future sacrifices to make to get where I want to go. If only there was assurance that letting go of people and things would pay off. . .

        . . .then maybe I wouldn't feel so guilty writing this right now. With the PDF of my module minimized on the taskbar. With three essays due today. Funny I wrote this on independence day. maybe this would be ironically liberating.

Started writing: 06. 12. 21.
Finished writing: 08. 18. 22.

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        Sobrang whirlwind sa feeling ng revision process nito HAHA. I would like to say that it was fun but I would be lying? Bukod sa may second chance or opportunity akong itama mga pagkakamali ko sa revision process, medyo jarring din siya. Because fixing things meant I had to have the courage to confront them first hehe.

        Tapos need ko rin silang isipan ng solution xD

        But to compare writing the first draft sa pagre-revise, I would probably choose revising. I don't know baka ako lang? Para kasing mas confident ako dito sa pagre-revise compared sa pagsusulat ng first draft na sobrang lala ng self-doubt ko. Pagdating naman sa schedule, I think pantay lang ang first draft and revision for me. Pareho ko kasi silang sinulat habang kasagsagan ng acads.

        Anyway, I just want to clarify that while I'm really thankful for the support of readers toward the first draft, itong revision ay sinulat ko mainly for me. Of course, sobrang saya kung same sa first draft ang pagtanggap dito sa revision pero. . . I also understand that I'm incapable of pleasing everyone.

        It's the main reason kung bakit ngayon pa lang, nililinaw ko nang sinulat ko ang revision for me; for my own improvement. Bonus na lang siguro kung magugustuhan niyo rin but again, wala na sa kamay ko 'yun hehe.

        I did what I have to do. I did the only thing I can do: write. The rest is up to you — kung magugustuhan niyo rin itong revision or hindi. <33

Started revising: 03. 24. 23.
Finished writing: 06. 06. 23.

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• This is (slightly) slowburn, so kung gusto niyo ng mabilisang ganaps. . . I'm sorry, but I can't give you that. I like the attempt, details, and everything in between the beginning and the ending.

• Expect 2K-6K words per chapter.

• Approachable naman ako so kung may nakaka-offend and/or mali akong naisulat, feel free to comment or message me.

• Please avoid commenting and mentioning characters from other authors' stories. I might delete your comment or mute you (depende sa mood HAHA).
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• This might contain scenes or words not suitable for children under thirteen (13) years old. . . read at your own risk.

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        This is the first installment of C Duology. To simply put it, wala po kayong dapat basahin bago ito. Posibleng may ibang characters (galing sa ibang stories) akong isingit dito pero s'yempre, hindi na sila ang focus.

        And last but not least, follow me @floeful on Twitter! And please, please use #dffdWP or #CDuologyWP when tweeting your reaction. I post a lot of drafts there before actually publishing them.

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This is pure fiction. Names, places, and scenes, that are related to a person living or dead are purely coincidental. The original image used for the book cover of this work is not the author's property. No copyright infringement intended.

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