Impotent Death: A Paranormal Mystery

Chapter Ten

"NOOO! It's gone! It's all gone!" I cried furiously. I gave the chest a hard kick and tugged on my hair in frustration. "We were supposed to get a million dollars for proving you innocent, Raymond! One million dollars! You promised! But apparently all we get is a stupid pile of sand!"
"Makayla, it's okay—" Ruth tried.
"No it isn't, Ruth! Don't you realize what we could've had? Our lives would've been perfect! I was counting on that money! I've put everything else aside to work on solving this murder, all because I expected to be paid in return! I'm done. I'm done with everything," I growled.
I'm not sure if I'd ever felt so angry in my life before. But can you blame me? Expecting to get a million dollars and then getting let down is not an enjoyable thing to experience. Especially since I'd wasted so much of my time for it. What was I doing with my life? Helping a ghost solve a murder? I was crazy.
"I need to get back to my homework," I mumbled. I walked past her and knelt down to go back through the tunnel.
"Wait! We need to figure out who stole the money first," Ruth said as she knelt down to follow me.
"Didn't you hear me? I said I'm done!" I snapped as I crawled on the dusty floor.
"What—what do you mean 'done'? Makayla, please, it was just money! It's okay, we'll—"
"It's really not okay. I've sacrificed almost everything in my life to help you with this, and it hasn't gotten me anywhere. So would you please just let me make my own decision here? I can't help you anymore. I—I won't."
My throat tightened up as I choked out the last word. It killed me to give up like this, but it was what had to be done. I couldn't go on trying to solve a murder that was simply unsolvable.
"Kevin says we should make a list of people who could've stolen the money and then—" Ruth began, but before she could continue I exploded with anger.
"I don't care what 'Kevin says'! If you two are so close, why don't you just solve the murder with him? He's probably a better friend than I am, right? The only people you care to make friends with are ghosts! You need to wake up and live in the real world with real, tangible people, Ruth. You need to stop living in the past."
I reached the end of the tunnel and felt thick tears running down my face. I didn't bother to look back and see if Ruth had followed; odds were she wanted to stay back with Raymond and cry about how I didn't want to help her anymore.
Why did things have to happen this way? Why, why, why? If only that money hadn't been stolen, everything would be perfect. I could have anything I wanted. I could have the world. Why did there have to be such terrible people in the world who were only out for themselves?
I lie in bed that night, ignoring my homework and letting anger stir inside of me... but the thing that made me more uncomfortable than anything I was angry about was how much I was feeling like one of those terrible people.

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     I didn't sleep that night. My dreams were filled with flashes of Ruth sobbing and begging me to help her and Raymond floating around the house searching for the thief of his savings. A figure dressed in black finally lunged for my throat, and that was what woke me up.
     I got dressed more slowly than ever and avoided contact with Ruth as much as possible during breakfast. I could tell she was glancing at me every now and then, but I chose to ignore her. I probably deserved the "Worst Big Sister in the World" award, but I tried my best to shrug off my guilt and force myself to stop worrying about solving the murder. It was time to clear my mind and get a fresh start with school; I was going to start actually doing my homework and turning it in on time.
     The twins and my mom said goodbye when I left for school, and by the way they talked to me I knew they could tell something was off with me and Ruth. But I chose to ignore their concern.
     Everything seemed to drag the whole day, and I felt on the verge of tears for most of it... until after school when Liam and I crossed paths in the hallway. It was really proof I was in a bad mood when I didn't feel like talking to him, but something inside me said that probably meant I should talk to him. Who knew, maybe it would help me feel better.
     To my surprise, he spoke first. "Hey, Makayla! How's your essay going?" He leaned up against his locker and munched on a bag of chips.
     I shrugged. "Oh, uh... it's going fine. I might choose a new topic, actually..."
     He frowned. "Wait, really? Why?"
     I sighed. "I don't know... there just isn't enough information on it..."
     "I see," was all he said. He smoothed back his hair and then asked, "You okay? You seem kind of... tired or something. Sorry, I guess that's kind of a rude thing to say," he added in a rush, and his cheeks glowed pink.
     "No, no, it's fine! I am actually pretty tired," I said as I reached up to cover a yawn. I leaned up against the lockers with him.
     "What's wrong, Makayla? You look like you've... had a hard time lately. It's okay to tell me, I promise I won't—judge you or anything." He looked at me with sincere concern in his beautiful grey eyes. It made me want to start sobbing.
     "Oh, nothing's really going on..." I started to say, but the words caught in my throat. Maybe Liam could help me get though this drama with my sister. Maybe boys were better at dealing with things like this. I sighed and muttered, "This is gonna sound pathetic, but me and my sister are kind of on weird terms right now. I was helping her with something, and now I can't, and... ugh, I guess I just feel bad I'm not helping her anymore, but I really can't."
Liam gave a confused smile. "Can you be a little more specific?"
How specific did he want me to be? "It's just hard to deal with siblings sometimes, ya know? I guess...ugh, I don't know."
"Why can't you help your sister?" Liam wondered.
"It's because..." I was overcome with a huge wave of guilt. "It's not that I can't. I guess I just don't...want to help her."
"Oh, well that changes things," Liam said with a chuckle. "Want is a lot different than can't."
"I know," I said. "I just don't know what to do."
Liam thought for a moment before he said, "Makayla, maybe you should just talk to your sister about it and be completely honest with her and yourself. And maybe you guys can make some sort of deal or something."
"That's a good idea..." I'd thought the money was Ruth's end of the deal at first, but in reality it had been Raymond's. It wasn't Ruth's fault the money wasn't there, so she didn't deserve to have me mad at her. "I guess I'll talk to her. But I just feel like such a terrible person. I'm so selfish." I really was a selfish brat. The money should've just been a bonus.
"You aren't a terrible person, Makayla. I promise. You're... you're pretty amazing," he said quietly, and I swear I saw him blush. He ran his fingers through his hair again. "Let me know how it goes with your sister and everything. I hope you guys can work it out."
"Thanks," I said with a smile. I gave him a small wave goodbye as I headed toward the doors.

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I found Ruth down by Mosier creek. Her tennis shoes and socks were lying in the grass on the riverbed, and she was wading through the water, playing around with various rocks and twigs. Her tiny frame went still for a moment when she saw me approaching, but in the next instant she was back to exploring the water.
When I neared the edge of the river, I called out to her, "Is Raymond around? I want to talk to just you."
Ruth shook her head. "He isn't here."
Silence hung between us for a few moments until I muttered, "Look, Ruth. I know you probably hate me right now, but please listen. I'm... I'm really sorry about everything I said yesterday. I was just so mad that the money was gone. I was expecting to get it, and I was let down. I know I shouldn't have gotten so attached to it, but I let myself. And I'm so sorry."
Ruth didn't look at me, though she'd stopped moving. She seemed to be staring off into space, but I could tell she was listening intently to each of my words.
"You know, Ruth? You're very different from the average person. You're so... aware of things. You've probably gotten to the point of being so aware of everything that you can—I don't know—predict the future or something!" I said. I sat down at the edge of the creek and started flinging pieces of grass into the water. "You're so different from people that you have this insanely incredible gift of being able to interact with a spirit. Not everyone can say they're best friends with a ghost."
"Where are you going with this?" Ruth asked.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is... the reason we should help Ray—help Kevin isn't because of the money or the attention. It's because of you. There must be some kind of reason—fate or something—that we happen to live in the Raymond mansion. That you happen to live here. You can see and talk to ghosts. Somehow, I don't think it's a coincidence that you met Kevin. You were meant to help him. I'm sorry for not realizing it earlier."
Ruth looked me in the eyes with tears sparkling in hers and shook her head. "You mean we, Makayla. Don't forget about yourself."
"I can't see him though," I said, feeling tears start to well. "It's you who has that gift. It was never me. I'm just... a brat who can barely see what's right in front of her nose."
"Don't say that!" Ruth cried. "You're amazing, Makayla. You're the best sister ever."
I laughed. "Good one, Ruth."
"Can't you take me seriously? You've helped me with solving the murder so much! You've been with me and talked with me a lot. For real. Not fake like Cameron and Benjamin."
I didn't know what Ruth was talking about. I didn't feel like I'd been sincere at all. But if Ruth felt that my spending time with her was sincere, I'd better keep doing it. And do it better.
"You don't have to keep helping me if you don't want to," Ruth said, looking down into the water. "It's hard and it's taking up a lot of time..."
"I'm helping," I said instantly. I stood up. "It's the only way I can make up for being a crappy sister for so many years. And don't try to tell me I'm a good sister because I'm not," I added when she opened her mouth to say something. "Let's do this—for real. Let's find out who killed Robyn, framed Kevin, and stole all of that money. And we're not stopping until we get all the way to the bottom of this."
Ruth's smile could've lit up an entire room as she whispered two words: "Thanks, Makayla."
And for the first time in the ten years of my sister's life, I felt like we'd made a solid connection.