My ʳᵘᵈᵉ roommate ◈ ᴍʏɢ

◈𝟙𝟘◈

Some days have passed. It has been the usual, me and my roommate Yoongi minding our own businesses. I'm actually starting to like my school a lot, at least the friends I made are very nice to me. They make me feel comfortable around them.

Now I'm on my way returning to the dorm from school. My friends Lisa and Jisoo decided to take the same path as me on their way home. We are gossiping about random stuffs.

"That's how I almost died choking on my chopstick" Lisa explains. 

"Wow that's intense" Jisoo said in awe, "I guess next time you won't try experimenting how tolerable your gag reflex is"

"Why is gag reflex tolerance even necessary?" I asked. They both stare at me in a way as if I said something dumb.

Lisa pats my head, "I see, you're an innocent baby" Jisoo nods.

"What do you mean I'm an innocent baby?"

Lisa looks at Jisoo, "Should I tell her?" Jisoo shakes her head. "Sorry...we rather leave you ignorant about that thing" Lisa says.

I whine "Nooo tell me!" "Nope!" "But whyyy??" "We ain't telling you anything. Let's keep it PG-13" "But I'm 17!" "Still no"

They kept on teasing me. But then suddenly Jisoo stops on her tracks.

"What happened?" 

She points at something while saying "Isn't that Yoongi?"

I look at that direction. Yes, it's Yoongi. And he's....petting some street cats with a big smile on his face. This is the first time I'm seeing him smiling. And oh god, his smile is so cute. He has a gummy smile! I feel warm inside.

"He likes cats?" Lisa exclaims, "He doesn't seem like someone who'd.....like cats and wait...HE CAN SMILE??? Guys this is breaking news! The stone faced Yoongi can actually smile"

"Shush Lisa, He will hear you" Jisoo whisper yells.

After some while Yoongi senses our presence and his smile immediately drops. He feels like a complete different person now.

"What are y'all looking at?" Yoongi deadpanned.

"You" Lisa says smoothly.

"Go away" Yoongi says and then leaves.

Lisa sighs "Guess he'll only be nice to you if you're a cat" Jisoo nods, "Not gonna lie he looks like a cat himself" "Yeah you're right lol. Maybe he's actually a cat and those cats are his family"

"Yuna, you seem quiet"

"Oh? It's nothing. I was wondering why he doesn't smile like that often"

- • - • -

It's midnight now. I'm usually asleep during this time. But I just realized that Yoongi isn't home yet....it's literally 1 am.

Will he be even coming back? Or is he sleeping over at his friend's place? Does even has friends? I doubt that. He's probably dead somewhere.

Then suddenly someone unlocks the door and enters. It's Yoongi. And yeah, he looks pretty dead. Dead but alive, a zombie.

"What made you return late today?" I ask. He gives me a look weakly. He seems very tried and also...done with life. Maybe if you try to look past that, you'll see a glint of sadness. 

Wait...is he okay?

"Don't...ask me anything. Go to sleep" He says and plopped down on his bed without even changing his cloths. I shrug and go back to bed.

After an hour or so, I swear I heard sniffles.

I think it's coming from Yoongi. I look towards his bed. He's curled up in his blankets. Is he crying?

Then I heard more sniffles and sighs. He probably is.

My heart sank. How much grief can make someone as cold as Yoongi cry? It must be something very painful. I have a strong urge to go and check on him. Maybe even try to comfort him. But I think that'll catch him off-guard. I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable.

I think something really bad happened. The same thing that made him return so late tonight.

Why does he hide his feelings behind a façade of coldness? Emotionless expressions? What made him think that he can't smile or cry freely? Who made him feel like his emotions are not worthy enough to be expressed and shared?

Maybe one day, he'll realize. He'll open up more.

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