𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐀 𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐄

Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve: To Intimidate

Running was something Draco was never fond of. He didn't like the way his feet connected with the ground or the way it sometimes jarred his knees. He didn't like the panting of the way his hands would open and clench. Flying was different. Flying required using his upper body strength, flexing his arms and his torso to steer the broom. It was elegant and smooth and being tied in with his magic made it more natural.

It was also something he wasn't allowed to do. The Auror that was watching him made sure of that. So Draco begrudgingly ran laps around the Great Lake, sometimes walking when he wore himself out. His guard for the night was a lazy old fool that leant against a tree and watched him go. Of course, the Auror put a tracking beacon on him — it was flashing yellow on his back — so he could keep an eye on him. Draco supposed it was better than having an athletic Auror jogging along with him. This illusion of freedom was very nice, thank you.

Another perk was that it was unlike any nightmare he's had, so he didn't feel the fear he normally felt when he thought the monster could be near.

Disappointingly, the run lacked the same adrenaline that flying provided him with. It would be impossible to say that a Seeker wasn't an adrenaline junkie but by his fourth lap, Draco learnt he wouldn't be experiencing the same awesome buzz. Instead, he was just tired and sore and sweaty.

The only show of promise was that it was giving him time to think — not that he hadn't suffered three days where his only company was his house-elf and his monster. Being out in the open, breathing in the chilly night air, was doing wonders for his brain. Out here, he could think about anything and everything, but his mind kept returning to his family and then to Potter.

Draco was still upset over his mother's decision to leave him be. It stung him in ways he'd never been stung before. For weeks, he couldn't help but feel sick to his stomach at the thought of his mother not caring about him enough to help him. The Malfoys weren't in line to win any humanitarian awards any time soon, but they were family. She'd carried him within her body for nine months and had given him life. He'd fed from her breast for months — she'd literally been the source of his life — yet she'd abandon him like he wasn't worth the effort. He just hoped she hadn't passed such a terrible trait onto him. No, he realised, he'd never hurt his child like this. If he managed to procreate, and they were going through the same situation, he would never consider leaving that child to fend for itself. Maybe he felt so strongly about it because he now knew what it felt like, but Draco was sure he'd never treat his child the same way.

And, of course, thinking about children led him to thoughts about his future and his predicament. Were thoughts of children sadly misplaced? Was he wrong to worry about his parenting abilities? Draco was terrified that yes, he was. He didn't have to worry about his future because he had no future beyond adult nappies and suicide.

He slowed his jogging pace down to something much slower, talking small, even steps with his hands on his hips as he focused on his breathing.

His relationship with Potter was so confusing that it hurt everywhere when he thought about it. He knew that his curse was one where he needed to find love and at this point, he could easily claim that he was. Draco had never experienced love before, and to begin with, he'd thought that this was just him being satisfied with the only person he slightly enjoyed spending time with. As they spent more time together, though, Draco quickly learnt that there was nothing slight about how much he enjoyed Potter's company. He craved the other man. He wanted nothing more than to be with him, regardless to their positions in the war or his gender or his friends and family. He didn't care that they were so incredibly different or that he wasn't a pure blood. All Draco knew was that his world was better when Potter in it and that was so blatantly obvious after these past few days. So many times he was tempted to search him out so he could see his face, but he stopped himself. There was a reason for why he exiled Potter from his room. Draco didn't want to put all his faith in his love for Potter if Potter didn't return it.