END FLASHBACK
I remember getting to the hospital looking down at the ground making sure I don't trip. Ma was walking so fast I was afraid I would fall. Walking in the emergency room was scary for just a 7-year-old. People were bleeding, crying, and saying goodbye to loved ones. It wasn't a place where I should be, I wanted to leave and go home. But I knew we had to see daddy and make sure he was okay.
When we got to his room I ran right in running right to his bed making sure he was able to see me. I only looked at his face nothing else mattered to me just that he was smiling at me. He was fine... he called me sweetpea and patted my head telling me that he was able to leave next week. Ma walked over kissed his head with a look of worry in her eyes. I sat right next to him and hugged him till I was tired. I turned around and leaned right next to him.
Ma said to not move too much. Daddy laughed and said he'll be fine not to worry. A few minutes later I said I was hungry. Ma looked shocked and cursed about how could she forget such a thing. Ma said she saw a vending machine down the hall that had sandwiches. She got up kissed daddy goodbye told him she'll be right back and that was the last time she spoke to him.
Right after ma left daddy stopped speaking and didn't blink. I thought he was just looking at me so I smiled at him and said I love you. He smiled back at me and closed his eyes and never opened them back again. Everything was fine until I heard beeping sounds come from the monitor. Out of nowhere doctors and nurses came in picking me up yelling who child is this while walking out of the room. I remember asking what's wrong with my dad. But never got an answer all I received was a look full of sadness and pity.
In comes in ma yelling trying to figure out what happened. The nurse hands me to ma and lets her know what happens before walking away. Ma grabs me by the shoulders and screams ''WHAT DID YOU DO'' '' THIS ISN'T JOKE ALBA WHAT DID YOU DO'' I was so shocked I started crying. This made her mad believing I had something to do with it.
The doctor came out and said that there was nothing they could do. That my father died two minutes ago. From there my life became hell, it was like walking on eggshells. I stopped receiving hugs and kisses. Sometimes ma would forget to feed me but she would always remember to ask me what did I do.
Burin came into our lives three years later daddy died. It was the same day I found out he died from a newly formed blood clot in his lungs. He seemed nice at first, he was big tall nice hair and lighter than ma and I. He introduced his two daughters to me, Chanel and Camila. They didn't like ma and I from the start, they felt as if ma was trying to replace their late mother.
A few months later ma and Burin got married and we moved to Queens. We lived in a nice seized house, big enough for everyone to have a room except me. The girls had their own room so did ma and Burin. There was one room left but it wasn't for me it was made into Burin's office. The original plan was for me to share a room with Camila since she was only two years older than me. But she and Chanel cried and said they haven't had personal space since their mother died and felt they needed space to think. Ma did try to help me but was told to shut up and care about his daughter's personal healing.
That's when the idea of me sleeping in the attic was announced. It was dark small and had one dim light blub that would only show the old boxes there. At least it had a window I could see the sunrise. Months later ma began to smile again looked healthier I felt comfortable around her again. Until Camila fell down the stairs and blamed me. I remember the rage in Burin's eyes, I remember his cold hands yanking me off the couch and throwing me in the broom closet. It was dark and dusty in there, I was begging to be left out of the closet. banging on the door and crying, till everything went dark. I woke up and was still there they have forgotten about me. So I sat there until they remembered.
I guess the house needed to be cleaned because I heard Burin tell ma to go get the broom. When the door open I heard a gasp I slowly move my head up wincing at the newfound light. Then passing out right there, apparently, I've been in the closet for two days. They thought I locked myself in the attic, I sat in my own waste for two days. That very moment let me know my life will be hell.
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The beautiful me
ChickLitAlba is a 23-year-old girl who is on a journey to self-love after years of being neglected and mistreated by her family. On this path to self-love, she finds herself fighting her demons Will she be able to find love for herself or will she fail and...