Wayfarer (Wanderlust 2)

Chapter Eighteen

Tanden lounged comfortably in bed the next morning, with one arm draped over Rayni, who was running her fingers across his chest and stomach. Soren was up, stoking the fire, while nibbling at bits and pieces of his abandoned dinner. Tanden was more relaxed than he had been in weeks. Watching Soren, snuggling with Rayni, comfortable enough that he could have easily drifted back to sleep.

He had missed women. He had never been with one person as long as he had been with Soren. He had never been good at focusing on one person. He had to thank every god and goddess there was for bringing Soren to him. Someone who was willing to let him branch out, and who was happy to join him.

"He's very handsome, your eeto." Rayni spoke so softly it took Tanden a moment to snap out of his thoughts. He dragged his gaze from Soren and repeated her words in his head to make sense of them.

"I agree," Tanden said, after a moment. And then as an afterthought, because it had been so long since he had last been with a woman, "Do you have the medicines in Tallen Tiya? To prevent babies?"

She laughed. "Of course we do. I have a vial in my pocket, I'll get it later." She continued to trace her fingers along his skin. "When I have babies, it'll be with someone I love."

"Exactly as it should be."

She tilted her head up to meet his eyes. "What about you? You two can't have children. Not without help."

"I don't want any," Tanden said, with the slightest shrug. "I wouldn't be around to help take care of them, or help their mother. I travel too much."

"Your eeto agrees?"

"Well, he..." Tanden trailed off, unsure if he'd ever actually asked Soren's opinion. Soren was still by the fire, poking at it, pretending to not pay attention. But Tanden could read his body language better than that. He knew Soren was listening, trying to pick out words he recognized. Certainly, he had heard Rayni say eeto, so he knew they were talking about him. "Soren?"

Soren turned around. He hadn't been lost in his own thoughts, he had been waiting. Attentive to Tanden's every need, as he always was. "Captain."

Tanden had been aware of Soren using his title as if it were his name ever since Tandar had pointed out to him. It was something Soren had done the entire time they had known each other. Tanden just wasn't sure when it had shifted, from a title to a sort of name, to something else entirely. Soren said 'Captain' the way other people might say 'my love', like the word itself represented affection and love. But it was still a title, and sometimes Soren said 'Captain' the way others would say 'my lord', full of respect and deference. There was no pinning it down. Soren transformed the word depending on what he was trying to convey. Love, respect—annoyance, on occasion. The further they got from the Wanderlust, and the further they got from other people calling him Captain, the more Tanden noticed the subtleties of Soren's use of the word.

Tanden blinked away the thoughts. "I love you."

Soren's smile was beautiful. It had taken sleeping with a woman for Tanden to realize that he missed them. But if Soren ever left, there would be no mistaking his feelings.

He continued before Soren could say anything. "I don't think I tell you that often enough."

"Aye, well, it would never hurt to hear it more often," Soren replied, his tone bemused. He leaned back comfortably in the chair he had pulled near the fire. "You're overthinking something, then? Or was it something Rayni said?"

Tanden didn't really need to answer the questions for Soren to understand that it was a mixture of both. "We talked about children once, my thoughts on children. But I've never asked you your opinion."