𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚 | 𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫

32

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟNOVEMBER 4, 2020*✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ

For the past few days, I've been feeling miserable. I think I realized that in the end, someone will get hurt. And I'm scared that it's gonna be me again.

Layla convinced me to go for a run with her. She said it will clear my head. We were running side by side for almost half an hour. I felt my legs being sore and I was slowly getting out of breath so I laid down on the nearest bench in the park and tried to calm my breathing down a bit.

My cousin stopped and looked at me. She could probably run for another three hours, she loved sports so much. "Why do you look like you're about to die?" she grinned at me and handed me a bottle of water. I thankfully accepted it and chugged the whole thing down.

"Because I am," I explained, still short on breath.

"Oh come on, this was supposed to help you! Not make you even a bigger mess."

I frowned. "I don't think I'm the running type."

"Well, you sure do run from your feelings, babe," she chuckled. When I got home from Vinnie's place on Sunday, I was really exhausted. I felt so trapped. There's no right thing to do. I obviously told Layla everything and she just started laughing at me.

"You're so sweet," she said then, "losing people is a part of growing up, you know."

But I wasn't ready to lose Vinnie or Troy. I knew my friendship with Troy's going to be weird now - even though I tried really hard. We weren't really in touch, we texted a few times but it was... awkward. The worst part was that everyone around us knows about Troy's little crush on me now. Well, it was just a matter of time before someone lets the cat out of the bag.

I was avoiding Vinnie since I left his place. I realized that this "fuck buddies" thing has gotten a little too far. I care about him a bit too much. We spend a lot of time together and we basically act like we're dating. And it started to scare me. It was confusing.

Layla and I decided to head back home because I looked like I'm about to collapse. Not to be dramatic or anything. We were talking about college and while we were getting closer to our apartment, I noticed a certain boy standing there.

It was PJ. "My life is a fucking joke," I mumbled to myself. I was pretty sure that Layla heard me because she chuckled quietly.

"He got uglier," she whispered to me as we got closer. I just rolled my eyes. Obviously. He's an ugly person.

"What are you doing here?" I snapped at him.

He didn't answer me, just gave me a sad smile. "Hey, Jade. Hey, Layla."

"Hey," my cousin said mockingly. "I'll just leave you guys to it."

"There's no need to," I replied trying to avoid looking at PJ and attempting to walk past him but he stood in my way.

"I'd really like to talk to you," he urged.

I sighed and looked him in the eyes. "PJ, I told you I'm not interested in that. I'm not interested in being friends."

"I just want to apologize and explain everything. We don't have to be friends but we don't need to be passive-aggressive with each other."

I scoffed and shook my head. "Fine. I'll shower and then we can talk."

"Okay. Thank you," he smiled. I told him to stay in my room. He sat on my bed and I headed to the bathroom and locked the door. This person literally shattered my heart into million pieces and I'm so desperate that I let him in. I can't believe it. I tried to shower as quickly as possible since I didn't want to think about him.