Billy and.....

20th April, 1991

Billy and I grew up in a small town, the surrounding pastureland being ideal for herbage mammals. One thing we used to do is go to the railway station stock yards. It could get pretty exciting on cargo days. We'd stand up on the fence rails midst all the noise of the beasts and shouts of the men, the sweat, the smell of the cows - the heaving mass shoved near and far, crammed into slatted boxcars for the journey out of town. I remember a solemn ruddy faced man with sun-browned arms, this heavy gutted man flicking his spent cigarette out over the cattle and spitting into the dust.

“Watch it, kid,” he said. “Fall in there you'll get killed dead.”

Billy looked at me and I just shook my head and grinned. We stayed where we were.

Killed dead! What was that?

***

Saturday afternoons we'd be at the movie house watching Westerns.

You'd hear those threatening clicks as guns were pointed, the firing hammer pulling back under the gunfighter's thumb.

Clicckkkk ...

The real world faded away. We rode with Jesse James, Billy the Kid, and the notorious Younger brothers … hills and mountains and grassy plains that looked a whole lot like the countryside round our town. Then we'd go home and practice our draw. One thing we knew: you had to be faster than lightning!

Billy's gun was fashioned from a handy piece of smoothed out apple wood. My gun had quality hard dark plastic with a pearly handle.

Billy would get this gun one day - same as he'd inherit my clothes and my comics.

***

Our mother died long ago. Billy could hardly remember her, though I could.

I could remember her putting dessert on the table - a dollop of cream on a slice of apple pie. She was sick by then and didn't eat much, herself. She'd just turn her gaze to the window and the sunset and the quinces ripening on the big golden tree.

When I turned seventeen dad gave me a gold ring. “It was your mother's, son. One day you'll find a woman to love and maybe settle with.”

I was somewhat affected by this inheritance.

I thought of Billy and went to my drawer to retrieve and bequeath him my Phantom ring, the one advertised on the comic's back page – the one with the skull embossed onto it.

Billy couldn't believe his good fortune!

***

About this time a popular family movie came to our town cinema. It was like the whole town turned up, though I went alone. Billy had a cold.

Fate had placed me that night beside a girl named Madeline. She lived on one of the farms way out by the mountains. She'd arrive into the district school on the bus every day with all the other country kids. I hadn't really noticed her before.

I was noticing now.

The movie was set in some foreign land ... though I was aware more - but not understanding - the hidden chemistry happening between me and the 'foreign land' that was the girl beside me. Out the corner of my eye : dark hair cut short, crocheted white cardigan, folded hands resting over a lemon colored skirt that had white polka dots, white socks pulled up close to her knees. A hint of hairspray.