aspen ;
the room stood still.
everyone around me was laughing. me, i stood in the corner. the red solo cups that everyone had filled with whatever alcohol they could get their hands on. but mine was filled with water from the faucet.
why? why couldn't i drink? every bone in my body wants me to get wasted, but i just can't seem to do it.
i step away from the corner i got all too comfortable in and headed to the kitchen. i scan the island and eye a bottle of "jim beam fire"
looking around, i noticed no one was paying attention. i unscrew the cap to the bottle and take a whiff of it.
cinnamon.
i dump my water out and fill my cup up to the brim.
"hey, sugar, do you think that's a good idea?" my body stiffens. my grip tightens around my cup and i turn.
my eyes meet with the chest of a boy. i look up to him.
i choke out a few words. "why wouldn't it be?"
i notice his jaw clench. "you stood in that corner," he pointed exactly to where i was standing. "for well over forty-five minutes. barley sipping on your drink."
i look down to our shoes. i've never been one to be good at holding eye contact.
his fingers trace my jawline to my chin. slightly pushing my head up, he forces eye contact. "honey, you don't drink."
before he could continue i blurt out, "you don't know that!" my voice came out louder than expected.
"oh but i do, but go ahead. drink that whole cup. hell, fuck it drink mine too!" he seemed pissed.
"hey everyone! over here!" my heartbeat quickens as everyone stops what they're doing and looks over in our direction.
i tug on his shirt like a child, "please, stop." tears weld up in my eyes.
this is too much. too much attention.
my vision started going out and i began to shake. fuck fuck fuck. not a anxiety attack. not here.
i look at my hand. lifting my cup up, i chug.
alcohol will help. that's why dad drank. it helped him. it'll help me.
the cinnamon burned. a lot. "oh fuck, everyone go back to what you were doing." i heard him say, taking the cup from the guys hand. i chug his too.
"that's what you wanted right!" i yell at him. my body still shaking. "there i did it and i want more."
i walk away from him going straight to the alcohol. i see a bottle of tito's. i don't know what it is but i open it.
smelling it i almost throw up. it smells strong. fuck it. i drank it straight from the bottle. it was disgusting. i wanted to throw up.
the guy grabs the bottle from my hand, "honey, slow down"
"who are you?!" i bawl. fuck. there i go crying infront of a guy. damnit aspen be better.
"that doesn't matter, but you've drank enough. hell you've drank too much." his eyes filled with concern.
i look him in the eyes. "i don't even feel drunk~" i tried walking towards him more, but my body felt a lot heavier.
"what's your name?" my words slurred as i fell into mystery boy.
catching me, he picks me up bridal style. "my names grant and you?"
he seemed a-lot nicer now. i locked eyes with him. i couldn't seem to stop starring at them.
that's the first time i've ever been able to hold eye contact for this long.
"i'm as.." i don't know why but i began to panic. "aspen, i'm aspen and i think i'm going to cry."
tears began to flood for no reason and grant let out a chuckle. "why are you laughing??" i say in between cry's.
"you're a emotional drunk. it was very predictable."
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a/n - hey guys, should i release chapter two? leave opinions!!
