chapter one

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"Have you been eating crowfood?" Jayfeather asked suspiciously.
"No," Finleap replied from where he was crouched in the medicine cats' den. "I know better than that," he added.
Jayfeather let out a snort. Then he's been stuffing himself with too many mice. As if I didn't have enough to do, now that—
He cut off the thought abruptly. "Have you eaten anything unusual today?"
"No!" Finleap protested. "I just know that my belly hurts. I have no idea why."
Jayfeather gave Finleap's pelt a good stiff, picking up the sour odor of vomit. Laying a paw on the young warrior's side, he could feel an unnatural heat rising from his body.
"He will be okay, won't he?" Twigbranch was crouched beside him. Jayfeather already knew this because, more than once, his pelt had brushed against the she-cat's as he tried to work.
He bit back the gentle growl that formed in his throat. Ever since she was a kit, she's been cluttering up this den. I thought we'd finally gotten rid of her, but here she is again, getting under my paws.
"Of course he'll be okay," Alderheart mewed soothingly. "You know cats get bellyaches all the time. Jayfeather will find the right herb, and I'll go to fetch some moss and soak it in water to cool him down."
With these words the younger medicine cat whisked out of the den. Jayfeather didn't try to stop him, though he knew it wasn't water that Finleap needed. He rose to his paws and padded to the herb store at the back of the den.
Rustling through the piles of leaves, Jayfeather tried to sniff out what he wanted, but he found it almost as hard as when he had been a new apprentice. It feels like everything's out of place, ever since—
Jayfeather tried to stop the memories from rising into his mind, but this time they were too strong. Leafpool, you shouldn't have died like that, he thought. It wasn't your time. And now ... it's like the whole world is somehow wrong.
He gave his pelt a shake, as if he could dismiss his grief like it was a bug crawling through his fur. There's no time for this. I've got work to do.

He snatched up the herb he needed, then hurried back to Finleap. "Here's some watermint," he meowed. "Once you get it down, you'll feel better in no time."
He set the leaves in front of Finleap, but before the young warrior could lap them up, Jayfeather heard Alderheart brush past the bramble screen at the entrance to the den.
"No!" Alderheart yowled. "Finleap, stop! That's coltsfoot, not watermint."
Jayfeather opened his jaws to tell his former apprentice not to be a mouse-brain. I may not be able to see, but I wouldn't mistake coltsfoot for water. And this is ... He bent to give the herb a thorough sniff.
Coltsfoot.
Alderheart was right.
For a moment Jayfeather was at a loss for words; he felt as though his head were spinning. A kit would know the difference. What's wrong with me?
He heard Alderheart pick up the coltsfoot and retreat with it to the back of the den, then return a moment later with what smelled like a sprig of watermint. "Here you go, Finleap," Alderheart mewed. "Swallow this down. You'll be soon right as rain."
"I don't know how any cat can find the right herb, the way Leafpool organized the store," Jayfeather snapped. "It makes no sense."
"Then why don't you change it?" Twigbranch asked. "You can organize the herb store any way you like, now that Leafpool is—"
She broke off, but Jayfeather knew exactly what she had started to say. Now that Leafpool is gone. He knew that Twigbranch was only trying to help, but a spurt of annoyance shot through him. Does she think I don't know that?
Twisting his head around, Jayfeather turned to face Leafpool's old nest. He inspected it every day, to remind himself it was still just as she had left it. Sometimes it doesn't feel like she's dead, he thought.
He would walk into the den they had shared and still expect to find her there, or to hear her voice. There were times I found her irritating—he could admit it; he found most cats irritating—but somehow the den feels empty without her.
"Twigbranch, you don't give the orders around here," he hissed, swiveling toward her again. "Why can't you mind your own business?"
He heard a gasp from Twigbranch. "I—I'm sorry," she stammered. "I didn't mean to overstep."
Before he could respond. Jayfeather felt Alderheart's muzzle close to his ear. "That was a bit harsh, even for you," the younger medicine cat whispered. "All Twigbranch ever wants to do is help."
Here we go again! Jayfeather thought. According to Alderheart, he had been snarling at a lot of cats lately. But even if that's true, they all deserved it!

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