Catfish | Matthew Gray Gubler

Time Wasted?

3 years later

Matthew Gray Gubler

"That's a wrap for today guys, go home." Glenn tells us.

Thank goodness cause I'm exhausted. I head to my trailer and began packing up my stuff, and then my trailer door opened and it was Shemar.

"Hey man, we're heading out to get a couple drinks. You in?" He asked me as he sat on the couch. I shook my head.

"I'm gonna head home and relax."

"You got a lady waiting for you or something?" He asked with a smirk on his face. I shrugged my shoulders.

"You do! Who is it?" He said. I smiled, but tried to hide it from him.

"Cmon man, don't leave me hanging. Who is she?" He egged at me.

"The one from two beats." I said and he looks at me, his eyes widen.

"The same person that wrote that weird message? You guys actually hit it off?" He said all shocked and I nodded.

"Wow, my man. So have you met her yet?" He asked me, but I put my head down and shook my head in shame.

"Why not?" I sighed and shrug my shoulders at him.

"I don't have the time." I half lied, but of course he wasn't buying it.

"Don't pull that with me man, what's the actual reason?" He told his arms across his chest.

"I'm scared. What if she's not the girl I imagine her to be? What if she finds out who I really am and only wants me for my money?"

"Wait, hold on. Does she not know who you are?"

"Not entirely. She only knows me by Matt and  that I model. That's not entirely a lie."

"But that's also not entirely the truth. Do you know how she looks?" He asked and I shook my head.

"What?! So you don't know what she looks like and she doesn't know how she looks? Have you tried FaceTiming this girl?"

"No."

"Aren't you a bit curious to know?"

"Well yeah, but her voice is all I need."

"Do you have a voicemail or something? I wanna hear it." I shook my head and scrolled through my phone to find a voicemail that she left me one time.

"I can see why, her voice is pretty sexy yet soothing. But in all seriousness, when are you gonna meet her? It's been what, 3 years already?"

"I don't know man. She's always asking, but right when I build the confidence to go, I flake out and come up with an excuse."

"And she still talking with you? This girl has a lot of patience with you."

"I know, I'm pretty lucky."

"But your luck will run dry soon, so you better man up if you really care about this girl to be talking to her for 3 years." He said and pats my shoulder before leaving my trailer.

I decided to call her to take my mind off things, but she didn't answer the first time so I called and called till she finally answered.

"Hello?" I heard her say.

"Hey, I've been trying to reach you." I replied.

"I was taking a bath and fell asleep. Watcha up to?" She asked me.

"I'm done with work so I'm packing up and heading home."

"How was work?" She asked. What am I gonna say? I have to come up with something and fast.

"Very long and tiring. Many hours of shoots, bouncing to different locations you know." I replied.

I told her I'm a model, which isn't really a lie, I am one but my full time job is an actor. I know she watches my show because I brought it up one time and she said yes and that my character is her favorite.

"Are you ever going to show me your shots?" I sighed on my end.

"Someday." I just told her. I heard her sigh on the other end. I've disappointed her, I know.

"Yeah someday." I heard her say on the other end. She's upset, I can hear it in her voice.

"Don't be like that." I tried to reason with her.

"Then I wasted 3 years of my life." She told me. Oh no, I hope she isn't saying what I think.

"What are you trying to say?" I said to her.

"I'm not using you as an excuse as to why I don't talk to other guys, but it's just something about you that makes me not want to talk to anyone else. But its been 3 years and we're basically going nowhere. We talk everyday or when we're not busy with work. We haven't shared a picture of ourselves with one another, we haven't video chatted, nothing at all. We only know each others voice. Now, I try and been trying to get you to meet me because maybe this bond we have could go further than just talking and being friends, but if you don't want to put in the effort as I, then maybe..." She said.

"Then maybe what?" I asked her. I know where this is going, maybe Shemar was right.

"Don't make me say it, Matt." She whispered.

I closed my eyes and hung up on her. I care about this girl so much, but I couldn't even tell her the truth about me, but she told me everything about her. I hope I don't lose her, we've been through a lot the past 3 years. And I hope I didn't mess up by hanging up with her just now.