Disappearance

Disappearance. I allow myself to get lost in my own void. By using my created dimension I grant myself temporary relief from all the problems I face. I program my brain to launch me from this cruel world into an abyss that grants solitude which eases the pain. I stand now, higher than any man in my position ever has but, mentally, I am in the lowest of lows I have ever experienced. Is this the end?

The view is beautiful. There is so much to learn from nature and its serene lifestyle. I close my eyes and allow myself to be engulfed by darkness. Reflecting back on life I think of all the problems I have had to face. This life seems so insignificant compared to the endless possibilities of the afterlife. All the worries and stress that I have endured over worldly matters seems so tedious now. I see The End as a haven, an answer to dilemmas, a voice to my holding back.

A step forward. Too long have I been struggling with this life and it's trials and tribulations. For once, I do not have to be arround people who claim to be loved ones. Countless times have I searched for an exit route from this pit but found it blocked by someone who "cares". Their expectations ever looming, their demands too great, their love artificial.

Another step forward. My life echoed the word "outsider". I was never accepted into any sort of circle or clique. Society labelled me as an outcast because of my introversion. What they do not understand is that just because a person seems different to "normal standards" does not mean they should be treated differently. In the end all the negative energy that they have cast upon me increases everyday. The negative emotions that have been passed down to me have weighed me down so far that I cannot see positivity as a reality anymore.

The penultimate step. Frustration crashes over me as I think of all of their unwelcomed, unwanted and unnecessary opinions. I don't need them. The edge beckons me and whispers my name. My body screams of doom and pain while my mind and heart are pampered at the thought of freedom and relaxation.

The final step.
Am I ready?
Is this The End?

I take flight. Weightless, worry-free: this is how I would like to have lived- too bad it will be short-lived. The air rushing passed me, pushing me back symbolising my life grasping at me, trying to keep me in this cold, depressing and material world. The cold openness douses the dying embers within my soul, cleansing it of all the anger and hatred. My new life awaits me. A wave of optimism and fear wash over me. I allow the new sensation to seep into my bones as every fibre and sinew in my entire being prepares for the landing.
Within a few seconds my problems had vanished and, with it, my very existence.

Disappearance.