Chapter 22

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Another one

The concert wasn't one of Louis' best. His mind was all the time with Harry. He looked at the side, where the curly boy usually follows his shows, but he wasn't there and it makes Louis' heart feel empty. He'll just have to accept that this is the way that it will be from now on.

After his concert Louis went straight to the hall where he signs pictures and whatever they give him for his fans. He has a small chat with some of them, smiles on pictures, flips some fans of which is part of the Louis fandom religion and hugs some of them. After an hour doing that, he moves backstage.

The biggest smile plays on his face when he sees a tall boy standing with his back to him, talking to Zayn, Harry, Eleanor and Niall.

"PAYNO!" Louis grins and runs up to the boy, jumping on his back. "Oh my god you are here. I missed you so much!" Louis gets off his back and then he gets pulled in a hug by his best friend.

"Here you are, little one. I've seen a part of your show, you were amazing Tommo." Liam coos. Louis can feel a pair of eyes burning on him. When he looks up he sees Harry just staring, his jaw clenched.

"Give me a break, I'm big." Louis pouts, slapping Liam's arm playfully. "I'm so happy you are here. I needed my best friend." And Louis wraps his arms again around Liam, ignoring the others that are standing there.

"I'm so happy to see you too, Lou. I always followed your live streams though. Concerts, interviews,... I have seen it all." Liam pulls Louis closer to him, knowing that his best friend needs this kind of comfort when he feels down.

"You are the best. I love you, Li. Want to have dinner together? I didn't eat before the concert and I'm starving now." Louis admits. He regrets not eating just because Harry was with him in the kitchen.

"Sounds good."

"I'm starving as well. Can I join?" Zayn asks, eyeing Liam.

"Of course you can, Zayn." Louis smiles. He likes hanging out with Liam and Zayn. They have always hung out together on tours and it's just the very best. Only now probably the others will join as well. "You can as well, Niall." Louis says himself. He wants to invite the Irish lad. They aren't that close yet but they are okay and Harry spends a lot of time with him as well and he is very fond of him, saying that Niall is the funniest lad alive.

Okay so maybe Louis is a little bit jealous, but he doesn't want to judge Niall. He looks like a nice guy and Louis should put his jealousy aside. It's not like Harry is his or ever will be.

"I'd love to. H, El, you joining?" the fake blond asks.

"No, I'm not hungry." Harry snaps.

"Don't be rude, Harry. I think we should get to know Liam. He is the most important person in Louis' life. Come on, we're going." Eleanor scolds, wanting to be liked by both Louis and Liam. Louis can see Harry's face expression change and his jaw clench even harder. His knuckles are white and his eyes spit fire.

"Alright, I'll grab my jacket then."

And Louis rolls his eyes. He always does what Eleanor says and this time he really hoped that their fight would be enough for him to go against his girlfriend. He doesn't want to spend the night with those two. He actually just wants to grab McDonald's, go to a pub, drink beer and have a nice lad's night where he doesn't think about the curly boy.

So, that's not going to happen.

Niall made a reservation for six in a nice Spanish restaurant and now the group is separated in two taxis. Louis begged to be in one alone with Liam.

"So, what's going on mate?" Liam asks when they are both in the backseat.

"Harry and I fooled around." Louis says immediately, not even wanting to sugar coat it. "Yesterday after the game we went to some pubs, got drunk, he made a reservation in a fancy as fuck hotel room, things escalated and we got each other off a few times." Tears are burning in his eyes.

"And he doesn't want to talk with you now?" Liam asks.

"He did want to talk to him. I want to push him away. He clearly said before we left that he will always choose Eleanor. He loves her. I was just a one time thing, some fun, maybe his one gay experience from his bucket list, I don't know. What I do know is that he doesn't give a shit about me. After we got back he and Eleanor were making out and I just couldn't watch, Liam." And Louis is letting go of his tears now, not able to hold them anymore.

"You like him?"

"I'm so gone for him." Louis admits. "And he gives me those wrong signals that maybe, maybe he likes me too. He gets jealous, he flirts, he started every thing yesterday night. But then in the end I was nothing more than some guy that got him off. Can I be loved for once, Liam?" Louis' sobs are loud and it breaks Liam's heart.

Yeah Louis seems like a tough guy in front of the whole world, but in all honesty Louis Tomlinson is the most sensible person that Liam knows. His heart has been played with a lot by guys who promise they can wait for him to get out of the closet, but always disappoint him. It hurts Liam to hear that Louis just go for boys that use him for a one time sexual experience and not see how much he is worth. Because Liam knows that every time Louis has had a one night stand, he feels dirty, unloved, used and he thinks less of himself.

"The right person will love you, Louis. I promise you. You know that I have lawyers looking into your contract." Liam whispers, stroking Louis' hair.

"You have now for three years, but I'm still stuck." Louis sobs. "And it doesn't matter. Even if I would be out, nobody will love me anyway. I don't deserve it. I'm not born to find love. I deserve the heartbreak I'm going through now. I am the one that made Harry cheat on his girlfriend. I'm a sick person."

"You are not, Louis. It was Harry's choice."

"You know what's Harry's choice, Liam? Eleanor, Eleanor is fucking Harry' choice. You know what I am? Some stupid entertainment. I'm just..."

Louis stops talking when the driver interrupts them, telling them they arrived at the restaurant.

Louis quickly wipes away his tears with the sleeve of his jeans jacket and walks outside the taxi, brightest smile shown in front of everybody, while deep inside his heart is just crumbling.

But it's alright, Louis thinks he deserves it. 

Eleanor, my girlfriend [Larry Stylinson]Where stories live. Discover now