Afraid

3

Sorry it's been so long since the last update

Hayley

As our lips gently brush together, Harry stroking my hair, he wriggles in closer to me. He starts sucking on my jaw, kissing me and getting firmer. I cant help but let out a tiny moan at his touch. He's so comforting.

His thighs touch mine, and I feel him go hard next to me. His kisses are gradually getting lower and lower. I let out a small whimper as Harry gets more rough. This will defiantly leave a Mark.

I don't know if I am ready for what I think is about to happen. I just spent all day running away from my mum.

It feels so good. But it feels wrong.

I try to pull away but Harry pulls me closer, kissing and sucking along my collar bone. I need to do something before he gets too far.

"Harry," i whine. He lets out a groan and pulls me closer.
"Harry," i repeat, trying to pull away.
"I don't know how to say this without sounding rude," i whisper.
Harry finally pulls away.
"What is it love?" He asks, with a concerned look on his face that I can just about make out in the shadows.

"I-i don't want to do this." I explain. "I'm not ready, I've just run away from home, I don't feel like doing anything right now. I just want to sleep"

"Don't worry Hayley. I understand." I'm so thankful Harry doesn't try and push me. He is so understanding. "I am so sorry if I upset you, I should have asked first." He continues.

I pull him in for a hug and kiss him on the cheek before murmuring a small 'thank you'  and closing my eyes, my cheek resting on Harry's bare chest, his hand combing through my hair.

Harry

I feel so bad. I never do that. I never try to do anything to a girl without making sure she's okay with it. I don't know what I was thinking.

What if she thinks I'm just like other guys, a dick who takes advantage of girls? I really like her, I'm so glad I found her, but now I am afraid I have messed it up.

As she rests her cheek upon my chest, sleeping peacefully, I can't help but lay there, wide awake, wondering if she will like me. Wondering if she will stay.

I play so many different scenarios over and over again in my head. Some are good, but most of them are bad. What if she hates me. What if she runs away from me? What if she doesn't talk to me anymore.?What if she doesn't forgive me?

After hours and hours of panicking, overthinking, I finally start to fall asleep. 

I thought that would be the end of the worrying, but I woke up abruptly after a nightmare. Hayley ended up leaving. She went back to her mother. I went on my daily walk and there she was. Lying in the gutter, covered in blood. It was all my fault.

I glance at the clock.
5:00 am.

Hayley is still fast asleep, so carefully I slide out from underneath her, trying so hard not to wake her. I grab a t-shirt and joggers as I creep over to the door and go to the kitchen.

I am starving. I grab an apple, and quickly scribble on a piece of  paper incase she wakes up while I'm gone:

Just gone to the shops, be back soon
Harry x

I throw on my cloths, grab my coat and keys and leave the house.

On my walk to the shops all I could think about was how she might think I've left her after she didn't want to do anything with me last night, or how she could see this as an opportunity to run away from me.

I should of driven, limit the time I am out, but I am a very active man. I barely drive anywhere and I go on 2 walks everyday, as well as the gym 5 days a week.  My mum is an actress, so she earns a fortune, and insists she will give me money and I that I don't need a job. I feel bad taking her money, but she told every work place near me not to hire me, so I don't have a choice.

Before I knew it I was at the supermarket. I need to make this quick. I check my shopping list.
Strawberries
Chocolate sauce
Whipped cream
Waffles
Pancakes
Golden syrup

I am going to make Hayley a delicious breakfast in bed, and I will apologise for last night. I need her to know I am a decent guy, and she shouldn't fear me.

I grab all the items and pay, before running home. I need to be quick, it is already 6am, I don't know what time she will wake up.

As soon as I get home, I get to work. I toast the waffles and pancakes, and add whipped cream and strawberries to one waffle, chocolate sauce to another and golden syrup to the pancakes.

I pour a glass of orange juice and place everything on a tray. I make my way upstairs, working out what I will say to show how sorry I am.

I open the door to find her still fast asleep. I place the food down and gently wake her up.

"Oh wow Harry! You didn't have to." She exclaims as she sees the breakfast i front of her.

"I did. I am so sorry for last night. I didn't mean to take it that far without making sure you were okay with it. I never do that, it is not like me at all, I don't know what I was thinking. I don't want you to think I was taking advantage of you, I was 100% not. I am so so sorry Hayley." I explain.

"Harry. It is fine, don't worry, I understand it was a mistake. I forgive you." She responds. "Also, for the record, I did kind of enjoy it while it lasted, I just don't feel ready to take it that far yet." She adds.

Thank god she understands. I am so relieved. "I promise from now on we can do everything at your pace. Your in charge."

"Thank you, Harry".  I lean forwards and kiss her on the cheek, before mumbling enjoy your breakfast and head off to have a shower.