He watches me.
Though we had only been talking for a few weeks now, I somehow felt desperate for his attention, for him to say his usual words of encouragement and compliments. I yearned for the things that only he seemed to give me while everyone else denied me of them, the 'You're not ugly's and the 'I need you's. I loved the warmth it would bring me to see that he in fact maybe did appreciate me and cared for my well being, promising that he wouldn't let me feel ugly or let me feel alone. Not like how everyone else made me feel. Not like how my family made me feel.
I looked at my moniter and smiled slightly when I saw that he had messaged me. Opening up my inbox, I impatiently waited for the screen to load as his text was finally readable across my screen.
Sirens38trico: Hi mi corazon :)
Rolling my eyes I quickly typed out a reply.
TsundreBunxXcx: Okay you need to quit it with the Spanish. You know I don't know what that means and it's lame :P
Sirens38trico: It means my heart
TsundreBunxXcx: Lame >:P
Sirens38trico: But you are :( You 're beautiful
I blushed at the comment, needing a moment to settle myself before typing.
TsundreBunxXcx: Yeah yeah.
Sirens38trico: Will you send me another picture today? :)
I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing. He did this everyday so it had almost become a routine. My heart fluttered in my chest thinking about how happy my pictures made him.
TsundreBunxXcx: Yeah hold on
Hopping out of my desk chair, I grabbed my camera before unlocking my bedroom door and padding over to the bathroom door.
"LISA!!"
I froze in my steps.
I knew that she would have been home today but I thought that at least dad would have kept here busy for at least a little while.
Keeping my voice steady, I called back cautiously. "Yeah, mom?".
"Get down here now!!",she screeched.
I jumped at the volume of her voice and quickly made my way to the source of her voice. When I found her, she had her fists clenched at her sides standing in the kitchen with pure fury in her eyes and empty cans of beer thrown on the counter tops.
Speaking through clenched teeth, she spoke lowly," I got a call from one of your teachers today".
Racking my brain, I tried to figure out if I had done anything wrong, but I could find nothing.
"Mrs.Moore. She spoke of something about an art show you should attend and that you had been exceling in.. band?".
I felt the blood drain from my face, cursing under my breath completely forgetting about the call. I searched my brain while keeping my eyes glued to the floor, thinking of anything to say me for this situation.
"Well, you know how dad used to love the arts. I just thought that maybe he could see my work and how hard I've been practicing to remind him of his old days in school...", I mumbled, flicking my eyes everywhere except toward the woman before me.
After a moments I heard her laugh mockingly at me.
"School huh?" she slurred and stumbled closer to me. "So..what? You suddenly think you're getting smart enough to brag about this to your father. Oh wait. I'm sorry" she placed a hand over her heart innocently and hiccuped,"Art and band doesn't really need you to be smart does it?".
She stood right before my and grabbed my chin, jerking my face forward with enough strenghth to make me meet her glassy eyes.
"Perfect for a stupid bitch like you."
I yanked back from her touch, a lump growing in my throat as I tried to forget the words, ignore them like I always do. I wanted to talk to my friend. I needed to hear those words.
Backing away from her, I kept up a pokerface. "Where's dad? I thought he would be home today."
She cackled, which only made my throat constrict more."Oh course you don't know." She stumbled to the fridge, searching for another can of her poison."Only business is on the mind of that man. Won't be back for at least another,"she attempted to count on her fingers,"3 months."
Though I knew I was expecting that of him, it still hurt to know that. Even after he promised me he would come take me to my art gallery and watch my last performance in band that I had spent 4 months in preparation for just for him, he would miss it just like he always does.
Ripping my gaze from my mother, I raced upstairs and locked myself in my room as I felt tears that I had been fighting for so long begin to poor. My room was the one place I could breathe and feel safe.
At least as long as the door was locked.
Walking back to my desk, I looked at my computer screen blankly before replying to him.
TsundreBunxXcx: I'm sorry. I don't feel like taking pictures right now.
Sirens38trico: ...Was your mother bothering you again?
I small smiled grazed my lips as he always knew when something was wrong.
TsundreBunxXcx: Yes but I'm fine
Sirens38trico: No you're not :( but i'll make you feel better. Skype with me.
Doing as I was told, I pulled up my Skype, found his username and called him in video chat. Once he answered I smiled.
The man on the screen was shirtless, with a slight beard growing on his face. He smiled at me, his eyes capturing me and freezing me right in that spot.
"Hi beautiful."
I wiped away my tears. "Hi."
He frowned, the slight wrinkles in his forehead crinkling. " Don't cry. That makes me sad. You want to make me happy, right?"
I nodded and he smiled at my response. "That's why I love you. Now, take off your shirt."
Obeying him, I slipped off my T-shirt and smiled cheerfully at him when I saw that he was grinning at me. He looked at me with a need and I felt butterflies in my stomach as he whispered "more".
We continued and I felt so beautiful with his eyes watching me. I loved how even though he was 26, he didn't care I was only 15. He needed me. Someone finally needed me.
His silky voice entranced me. "That's right Lisa. Play for me. I love you. Keep going." He took pictured but I didn't care right then. I just listened to the sickly sweet words that he knew I yearned to hear. He smiled his sweet smile.
"I love you. You're beautiful."
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AUTHORS NOTE:
HOLY SITH IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I UPDATED THIS. OH HOW YOU GUYS MIGHT HATE ME. (Nah you guys know you don't c: )
Anyway, I hope you guys liked this and I hope this doesn't turn out to be like only one page because I swear that this has to be at least 2 pages. 3 if this author's note thing is slightly long.
COMMENTS AND VOTES ARE APPRECIATED AND MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND THE TOWN SO YEAH YOU MIGHT WANNA GET ON IT PEACEKIES
