Struggling to be beautiful (On Hold)

Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

"True beauty in someone is reflected by their soul"
-Audrey Hepburn

Staring in the mirror is like torture. Just the fact that the reflection staring back at you is just not good enough. After that night I found out that my look wasn't enough, my flaws started to stand out more. The fact that I have a square type nose bothers me. Why couldn't it be small and perfect. My green eyes don't seem to fit in with the rest of my face. I have a few blemishes, which seem to cover my face. My hair doesn't have enough volume, it's just a dull brown colour. I don't have an envious figure, I'm just plain. That's all I'll ever be.

Sometimes I just spend my time looking in the mirror, and beating myself down repeatedly, enough so that I would be reduced to tears. Today was one of those days.

I wipe the stray tears from my cheeks and make my way back into my room. That's where I spend most of my time anyways. I don't even sing anymore. It was the only form of happiness, but it was taken away from me. So why bother. Knowing I have school, I inch towards my closet to pick out what to wear. It doesn't take long to find my outfit. A plain blue t-shirt, with black leggings. That's what my wardrobe consists of now-a-days. No more fancy dresses, or pretty tops. I mean who was I trying to impress?

After heading back into the bathroom, and covering the mirror back up again, I quickly brush my teeth and take a brief shower. When I dress up, I head downstairs to grab a quick bite to eat. I wasn't much of a breakfast person anyways.
"Rhea, how did you sleep." My moms sweet voice questioned from behind me.

I slept horrible.

"I slept fine mom." I lied.

"Ok, that's good to hear. Your dad and I have been so worried sweetie," My mom finally stepped into view. "I'm so glad you're getting better." I could see the sense of relief in her eyes.

I didn't want to lie to my parents like that, it always made me feel bad. But I also didn't want them to worry too much, and then try to put me into therapy. I hated therapy. I agreed to go once and it was awful. They asked really personal questions that made me uncomfortable, and they made me talk about my feelings. I've never been one to express how I feel. Only through one way though. And that had been taken from me.

When I finished eating my apple, I decided it was about time to head out to school. It was only a 5 minute walk from my house, so I didn't have to really worry about leaving on time.

As I followed the familiar path to school, I couldn't help but wonder what my future would hold. Was there a bright future ahead for me, or was I just doomed to eternal pain and conflict. Tugging my dark hair in frustration, I started thinking about my image again. Was there a way I could fix it? That was the question that kept repeating in my my over and over. No amount of makeup could fix my flaws. There were just too much.

As I reached my school doors, I could feel the wave of dread wash over me. I thought of the students that roamed the halls. They stared sometimes. I didn't like it when they stared. Pushing my way through the doors and past the crowded hallways, I finally made it to my locker. Opening it slowly I grabbed the textbooks I needed. By the time I was done the bell rang signalling the start of class. Everyone rushed past each other. Rushing to get to their classes. They didn't notice me, the girl with the flaws and all. Just the way I liked it.

A/N: So here's chapter 1. I'm so glad people are actually starting to comment and vote. This is so amazing. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter, yes it's a bit slow at the start but I swear it's gets a lot better. And remember keep the votes and comments coming, that would be amazing. Thanks!